Tom Terry shares Biblical truths on successful relationships and sexual purity on Ask Roger and Friends this week. Dear Tom, Why does lust destroy marriage? Sincerely, Devon Dear Devon, Here …
Marriage
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So… you’ve been dating for a while, and you’re thinking: “Yeah, this is the one.” That’s great, but are you ignoring any red flags, those important things you can’t accept? …
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Are you married? Do you have opposite sex friends? Maybe you think it’s OK, but what does your spouse think? So, if you’re in the midst of an opposite sex …
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Dear Roger, I am getting married, but I know so many couples who get bored and frustrated with each other when the “honeymoon” wears off. My own parents have been …
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Have you heard from Heaven a calling for your marriage? It’s not a one-size-fits-all. God has a plan cut out just for you! With principles from the Marriage Devotional and …
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When John and I were first married, things proved far more difficult than either of us had imagined. In our youthful naiveté, we thought that because we were in love …
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I often see couples wince in marriage counseling when I bring up Paul’s admonition to wives in Ephesians 5. Paul’s instructions to married couples begin with those fated words, “Wives, …
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For the first ten years of my marriage, I struggled with the fear of abandonment. My father and my first pastor had both left their wives for younger women. Because …
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Week Four of “Substitute Identities.” God’s purposes for us are to have our identity rooted in his calling for us to be saints and to trust our sexual lives to …
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Dear Roger, I was digging into the book of Hosea, and I don’t understand. Why would God tell him to marry a prostitute? God had called him to …
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Forgive Quickly. The Bible speaks of keeping “short accounts.” In other words, don’t hold on to anger. Keep your marriage “current” instead of bottling up past issues, only to release …
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Recently one of the members of our connection group courageously poured out her heart. She felt disconnected from God and bruised by a challenging season of life. “How can I …
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For the first ten years of my marriage, I struggled with the fear of abandonment. My father and my first pastor had both left their wives for younger women. Because …
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You married with the hope of sharing your life with someone who’s as pumped to make the most of it as you are, so how did the two of you …
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So… you’ve been dating for a while, and you’re thinking: “Yeah, this is the one.” That’s great, but are you ignoring any red flags, those important things you can’t accept? …
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Respect is a key factor in creating a loving family. Here are just a few ways you can make your family stronger and kinder! www.deborahhaddix.com
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Articles
If We Are Married to Jesus in Heaven, Will We Know Our Earthly Spouses?
by Randy Alcornby Randy AlcornOne of the most frequent questions I’ve been asked about Heaven over the years is about the nature of marriage there. As I share in my book Heaven, there will be one …
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Dear Roger, I’m a very worried Christian wife. My husband has completely changed over the last several months. He is constantly surfing the internet and delivering angry “the sky is …
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DEFINITION Sexuality refers to God’s anthropological design and pattern for the procreative relationship between male and female and to the experience of erotic desire within that design. Gender refers to …
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“The biggest problem in our marriage is our communication.” It’s perhaps the most frequent issue that is brought to the table when Angel (my wife and counselor) and I meet …
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The day had finally arrived. Years. Now, I mean years had gone by…notwithstanding great disappointment. You see, this was a day of miracles. It shouldn’t even have been happened. Not …
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Five Questions to Ask when Thinking about Divorce During the global pandemic we’ve endured the past year, 31% of those divorcing say the lockdown caused their divorce or certainly contributed …
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We tend to view marriage through the lenses of consumerism. We live in a day and age where individual happiness is the ultimate value, so marriage becomes primarily an experience …
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“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does …
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So you’ve been sheltering in place and quarantined with the people you’re supposed to love most for months now. And how exactly is that going? If you’re like most …
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Is a lifetime commitment to a spouse even reasonable? Does permanence have to become a goal if it means a couple just has to grin and bear it? What if a …
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You’ve heard people say that marriage can be hard, but you didn’t know it could be this hard. You married with the hope of sharing your life with someone who’s …
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Adultery is devastating. In the aftermath of an adulterous affair, the offending spouse must first turn away from sin through repentance before God. But after such repentance takes place, …
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Encouragement is a powerful way to deepen your intimacy with your spouse and to reflect the loving character of Christ.
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It’s ten o’clock, do you know where your husband is? Apparently many Americans are asking this question, judging by the sales and buzz generated by The Script: The 100% Predictable Things …
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Paul teaches the importance of waiting for the right person, to maintain your sexual purity and to not be afraid to be single when He calls you to be. He …
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If you have breath, you are the proud owner of conflict. It lurks around every corner of our days. I wake up first in our home. I get dressed and …
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At the age of twelve I started praying for my future husband. In the beginning my prayers were driven by my fear that I might marry the wrong person. …
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1. Forgive Quickly. The Bible speaks of keeping “short accounts.” In other words, don’t hold on to anger. Keep your marriage “current” instead of bottling up past issues, only to release them …
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Don’t be stingy with your stuffing. Don’t be tight with your tortilla casserole. Abigail, the consummate hostess, was the Martha Stewart of her day. She calmly faced an army of …
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Drs. Roger Barrier and Chet Weld discuss the dangers of dealing with dysfunctional people. How can you love them and still set boundaries?
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(Dear Reader, the following letter was written by a woman in another country who is in the throes of an acrimonious, three-year dragged out divorce. I am choosing not to …
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I have two sets of parents. Both couples were wed during the Jurassic period (not really). Both were married almost 60 years. I watched each twosome grow old together. One …
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“Unless the Lord builds the house, they that build it labor in vain.” Psalm 127:1 Marriage can be hard sometimes. Does my marriage, if a healthy one, really help me …
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Forget online matchmaking sites. If you need some tips on finding love, perhaps these weird and wonderful Old Testament tales will inspire you. We will also examine four passionate Bible …
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Dear Roger, From the time I was about 7 until I was a teenager my step dad … sexually abused me. … Even though I grew up abused I felt …
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Dear Roger, I have been through a bad divorce, and have no way to earn back my assets now at 64. Is it wrong to ask for a prenuptial agreement? …
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Dear Roger, Our small group is reading through the New Testament together. I never realized how much of the Gospels was devoted to the subject of demons. I got to …
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Dear Roger, I’m thinking about getting married. Can you give me some guidelines that may help me know that I am marrying the right guy? Sincerely, Kate Dear Kate, …
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Dear Roger, I identify as asexual. An asexual person is a person who has no sexual feelings or desires for another person. Some asexuals can experience emotional attraction, but it …
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Dr. Kevin Leman shared three keys to helping your kids through a divorce: There’s no such thing as an “easy divorce” – for anyone involved. Kids of divorce feel like …
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Dear Roger, What do you think about gay marriage? I’d like your take on the issue. Sincerely, The Many Who Have Asked Me About Gay Marriage, First, let me say …
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Sex can be really beautiful or really dangerous because it brings the body and soul into a kind of wholeness not otherwise known. It is a good gift of God …
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Some might have experienced the forgiveness of Christ but you are still living as though you are in debt. You feel as though you need to add onto the cost …
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Dear Roger, What do you think about the following marriage situation – An unbeliever commits numerous acts of adultery while single, then deceives a believer into getting married. …
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I once heard someone say that the relationship between a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most fragile of all human relationships. If you are one of those people, you already …
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Recently, John and I did a joint question-and-answer session on marriage. As the session closed, this big question came up. “After more than thirty years of marriage is there anything …
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How your teenager will respond has everything to do with respect-your kid’s respect for you, and your respect for your kid. Respect begins from the earliest of stages and builds …
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I’m not sure if this is in a book somewhere, but it’s widely known that the easiest way to get out of a Christian dating relationship is to throw the …
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I know a lot about weddings. I used to write advertising for a company that specialized in rental tuxedos. One of my jobs was to answer all the emails that …
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Oftentimes, it feels like marriage is an expectation society has for each of us—as if marriage will make our lives complete. What happens when marriage doesn’t come quickly for us? …
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Fifty-four percent of American couples are choosing to live together rather than to be married. We must ask ourselves: Which “benefits” of cohabitating are you most tempted to believe? How …
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Is your marriage in trouble? Many couples I see will inevitably tell me the tale of being in a sexless marriage for months, years, or decades. I smile and tell …
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There are over 300 identifiable human needs. So how do you meet the needs of the children in your home? These thirty needs are carefully described with accompanying Scriptures. Tape …
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Dear Roger, My Dad is disrespectful to my mom almost every day, and it upsets me. He often tells her to stop talking because he’s tired of hearing her talk. …
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“What would you do if you were 22 again?” I was recently asked that question as part of a conference on world missions. I turned 22 in the middle of …
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Genesis 2:18 “The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” NIV I will make….. …a helper …
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The Knot recently did a study and found that over the past seven years, weddings in churches have dropped from 41% to 26%.[i] Wow. Did you hear that? Only a quarter …
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I remember one couple, Bob and Mary, in their early 50’s, who came to see me for a psychiatric evaluation. They were both very polite and somewhat mechanical in their …
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The good news about a single Savior who provides abundant life for all who die with him… Jesus didn’t view his celibacy as a no…no to joy, no to sex, …
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Dear Roger, The man I am love with is anti-social, and a very shy person. He lives in the country with little to no communications with others other than …
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One of the most frequent questions I’ve been asked about Heaven over the years is about the nature of marriage there. As I share in my book Heaven, there will be one …
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Dear Roger, I have a problem and don’t know how to help myself. When I was about 6 or 7 years old, I was sexually molested. For a long …
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Adultery is devastating. In the aftermath of an adulterous affair, the offending spouse must first turn away from sin through repentance before God. But after such repentance takes place, there’s …
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Here is a conversation between Dr. Kevin Leman and a frustrated wife. Does your husband fail to listen when you are hurting? These words may be for you! Laura’s Question: …
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Can a wife be both strong and submissive? A tough question….Here’s my story. I’ll be brutally honest. My Dad wanted a son to take over his business. He had two …
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The world around us is not just wandering, but running, away from the biblical foundational truths concerning marriage and Who created it. So it would then follow that worldly solutions …
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Is it possible to see betrayal coming? Some red flags are not as obvious as others. For example, if you discover that your man gets drunk with his mother and …
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Dear Roger, The chaos in our government is breaking my heart. I wonder if any politician is righteous and honest. It seems like no one tells the truth any …
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Is there a surefire way your marriage can be protected from adultery? Dr. Russell Moore gives us his opinion: “Whenever one sees a marriage fall apart due to adultery, one …
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One of my favorite Bible characters is Rebecca. So today we are in Genesis 24, witnessing Abraham’s servant being sent to find a wife for his young master. The story …
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Three marriage myths may hinder the relationship between husband and wife: Unrealistic expectations, that we can change our spouse, and that a love relationship is easy. Learn that relational pain …
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As I have studied the Scripture, observed others’ lives, and seen deeper glimpses of my own heart over the years, I have come to realize that no one—no matter how …
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This comprehensive study was jointly written by Matt Chandler and Geoff Ashley. Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Psalm 127:3 In …
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Dear Roger, I am a long-time Christian who has been married to the same woman for 42 years. My experience is like Paul’s (2 Corinthians12:7), thorn in the flesh. …
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If you could only tell your top leaders a few things, what would you tell them? 1. Your competency will take you only as far as your character will sustain …
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When we ask the question about what draws others to us, we might first want to determine why we’re asking the question. This magnetism is not about popularity, attractiveness or …
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Have you ever been in a volatile relationship? The word “volatile” means “liable to change rapidly and unpredictably, especially for the worse.” You may be sitting next to a terrorist: …
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How do you influence another person for good or evil? How do you effectively pass on your spiritual legacy to someone else? Elijah and Elisha, Moses and Joshua were both …
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“Most Americans, white and black, see racism as a lingering problem in the United States, and many say they know people who are racist. But few Americans of either …
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“Once Upon a Marriage, Part Two” is the story of a passive husband, King Ahab, and his controlling wife, Queen Jezebel. A truly bad romance, both partners were self-centered and …
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Revelation 2:8-9 8 “To the angel of the church in Smyrna write the following: “Thus says the one who is the first and the last, the one who was dead, but …
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“I think I’ll go with you today,” Ted informed Krista as she started out the door one Sunday morning. Her stomach knotted. She glanced at him, wondering what brought this …
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Understanding the Neuroscience Behind Online Harems A wife who stumbles on the Internet tracks of her husband’s porn tour is often shocked at the number of images and videos in …
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Pastor Francis Chan deals with the moral failure of a church leader in a wise, compassionate, godly fashion. Sin must be dealt with, but our focus in facing the issue …
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Jeff Foxworthy, the old, redneck comedian who readily admits that he is “not smarter than a fifth-grader” is wiser than he looks. In spite of his humble roots, Foxworthy teaches …
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Over the last two weeks, we announced that the U.S. now has at least 8,000 multisite churches (by the broadest definition) and also 5 trends in how multisites launch and …
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The Tolerance of Jezebel in Thyatira (Rev. 2:19-24) people? 19 ‘I know your deeds: your love, faith, service, and steadfast endurance. In fact, your more recent deeds are greater than …
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Velcro love sticks and stays. God’s HESED love causes us to act on commitment, not feelings first. Suffering is the context where true love begins. Christ’s sacrifice is the embodiment …
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The beautiful love poem of Solomon to his bride teaches much about the passion, permanence, power and procreative purpose of marriage. Marriage is a holy covenant based on sacrifice and …
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In Leo Tolstoy’s novel The Death of Ivan Ilych, the protagonist, Ivan Ilych, is a smart, competent attorney dying from an unknown cause. Tolstoy describes a scene in which Ivan …
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Dear Roger, I am the pastor of a 100 member adult church and I was informed today that my largest giving family will no longer be with us. This family …
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God made both men and women in His image with equal worth and value. He also made them distinctive-equally different, and gave them the responsibility of ruling over creation. Gender …
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Do you want to keep a pulse on the next generation of seekers? How do they perceive Christians, and why should it matter to us? The Barna group, in a …
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The number of very large churches continues to increase, as our graphic dramatically illustrates. And within that group, the biggest churches continue to get bigger. In the past I’ve written …
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Preached at Elevation Church as part five of the Mr. and Mrs. Better Half series, Craig Groeschel emphasizes the importance of commitment and unconditional love to navigate the difficulties of …
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Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. (Heb.13:4) No doubt, our culture is sex-obsessed …
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God accepts you unconditionally, loves you sacrificially, understands you intimately and relates to you continuously.
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Dear Roger, Recently, I discovered that some very close Christian friends of ours are involved in “swinging”, where they basically trade each other for sex with other consenting couples. We …
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If you’ve ever traveled to another country, you may have noticed you don’t see many moody teenagers. Why is this? Young adults in the rest of the world aren’t like …
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There’s always that one kid. The kid who won’t stay in his seat at the restaurant. The girl who has to have the last word. And the boy who’s always …
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What if Jesus walked into your church office, applying for a staff position. Would He be welcomed? Would He be laughed out of the office? Would he be politely dismissed …
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In the series “So Worth It,” describing life lessons learned from the bride and groom in the book of Song of Solomon, we discover that there is trouble in paradise. …
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How do you experience healing for the shame wounds in your life? Confess your sin. change your lifestyle. God believes in you. Don’t be afraid to pray simple, honest prayers. …
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Society has its notion of what makes dating, relationships and marriage thrive. But a quick look under the hood reveals a longing to get back on the right track-a longing …
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Dear Frustrated Single Young Woman, Maybe you read Owen Strachan’s letter to frustrated single young men and wonder how to respond to your singleness and also to men who have …
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Fighting fair as a couple will preserve your unity as a couple and deepen your love. Don’t use words to wound. Re-frame your language away from judgment. Be compassionate and …
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When your marriage is losing altitude, your relationship devolves from fascination to boredom to contempt. When your marriage is gaining altitude, your relationship goes from intimacy to connectedness to fascination. …
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Your values are what you want to stand for, what you want to do, or how you want to behave. You can take a fixed approach or a principled approach. …
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Do all men leave? For the first ten years of my marriage, I struggled with the fear of abandonment. My father and my first pastor had both left their wives …
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The simple answer is no from a biblical perspective. But here are some thoughts to consider. Articles about Jesus and marriage has a lot of people speculating. Was Jesus married? …
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Have you ever experienced betrayal? Well the first time it happened to me I was 17. We lived in Columbia, South Carolina, and I was very involved in basketball. I …
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Marriage isn’t easy or fair. Love is a choice, not an emotion. Master the marriage cycle: joy, disillusionment, misery, understanding, mature love. Submission is putting the needs and interests of …
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The old guy at the corner hasn’t seen him. The woman selling the figs hasn’t either. Jesus described him to the scribes at the gate and the kids in the …
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We must watch for the “danger of the drift” or slowly falling away from God. What is the power of hidden sin? It kills good judgment causing a downward spiral …
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“I quit!” I told my husband. “I’m leaving our church. This church no longer brings me life. It brings me death. I am going to another church.” I had been …
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Hosea was asked by God to marry an unfaithful woman and love her unconditionally. In doing so, he demonstrated the kind of amazing love God has for his children.
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Singleness and marriage are both gifts from God. Intimacy is indispensable to marriage. When we deny sexual intimacy, we are cheating the marriage.
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Sermons
Christ-Centered Relationships: Intimacy with God and Your Spouse
by Francis Chanby Francis ChanFrancis and Lisa Chan discuss how to have undivided devotion to God in a marriage and as a single person. A person who is not married has freedom and time …
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The biblical concept of submission in a marriage relationship is applied as it models the relationship of Jesus and His bride, the church. Negative connotations of submission are dispelled, and …
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Paul explains that this marriage and this union of a man and a woman coming together and becoming one flesh was just a picture of something far greater. It is …
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What if you are confused by God’s actions? “Joseph … did what the Lord’s angel had told him to do.” Matthew 1:24 The white space between Bible verses is fertile …
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The Apostle Paul unpacks in (ch. 10) some insights to what true freedom for believers entails. It’s a “guided freedom” – a freedom that exercises constraints at times – that …
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We learn much about life from watching impoverished widow Ruth come to the fields of her kinsman Boaz. First of all, God has answers that we don’t know about. Faithfulness …
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The concept of loving submission for the wife and gentle protection of the husband is discussed in Paul’s letters. Why use this model? Because it deepens love and friendship between …
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Adultery in our culture has become acceptable, even commonplace. The path to promiscuity is paved by a lot of prominent people. It is amazing what happens in this process. How …
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Lone Rangers are just that: lonely. Frank and ferocious, Saul of Tarsus epitomized the self-made Pharisee. Like 007, he traversed his homeland, brutally exterminating Christians like bugs. Until Jesus got …
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Got any aches, pains and complaints? Anyone who served in World War II would say, “Sure. It cured everything!” The acronym APC was widely used in the middle of the …
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Selecting a marriage partner should be a divine appointment. We should seek God for the partner He has for us. We must be spiritually compatible, start with the end in …
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Salvation is by grace through faith. That is a foundational truth. But it is usually understood to mean that nothing you do contributes to salvation. With this, a pervasive passivity …
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Sermons
Toxic Relationships: Identify the Interpersonal Traits of Unsafe People
by Chet Weldby Chet WeldUnsafe people can sabotage relationships by dishonesty, selfishness, control, condemnation, codependence, betrayal and secrecy. Learn how to discern the relationships in your life that are healthy and productive.
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Male and female are co-reflectors of God’s image. Sexuality is the human derive toward intimate communion.
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In life and in love, timing is everything. Beauty and bliss can occur in every stage of the marriage relationship because God intends each day to be sweeter. As we …
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Jesus had much to say about divorce and remarriage. The sermon deals with what Jesus said about marriage and divorce, whether or not Jesus was a liberal or conservative when …
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On my evening commute the other day, I was amused by a motorcyclist who passed, wearing a club vest bearing the name “Loners”. Hmm! A club for loners? The club …
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What qualities do you consider most important in the man or woman of your dreams? What kind of person do you think will make a good lover? One woman in …
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King Solomon teaches many valuable lessons about love and romance in the marriage relationship. We learn from him that love is pure, love protects and love is passionate. In the …
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Jenny Simmons recently wrote me a cool letter from Bussloo, Apeldoorn, Netherlands where their band Addison Road was touring. She talked about how weird it felt to be in a …
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Dr. Toussaint, in a fatherly chat, teaches seven key criteria for choosing a mate: respect, compatibility, intimacy, mutual goals, maturity and acceptance from the extended family.
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King David is called “the sweet psalmist of Israel” in 2 Samuel 23:1. On top of that, he is the most frequently mentioned individual in the psalm headings throughout the …
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The first pillar in the Biblical foundations of instrumental music in worship is the Psalms. When considering the Psalms and instrumental music, most instrumentalists think of Psalm 150, but there …
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Dear Roger, If Adam and Eve had only boys, how did their children reproduce to create the world’s people? Incest? Sincerely, Questioner in Casas’ “What’s Next Class” Dear Q, According …
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Jesus Christ, as our High Priest, made a once-for-all sacrifice for our sins. As we experience His complete forgiveness in our own lives, we should extend that same forgiveness to …
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Marilyn Morris, founder and president of Aim For Success, Inc. and author of Teens, Sex and Choices and ABCs of the Birds and Bees for Parents of Toddler to Teens …
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Seven biblical foundations for successful marriage include courtesy, romance, esteem, communication, time, and conflict resolution.