How Do I Heal Hurting Hearts This Christmas?
Dear Roger, The holidays are here! Joy and excitement are everywhere! Well, not everywhere. You and I both know that there are a lot of hurting people at Christmas time. A lot of…
Dear Roger, The holidays are here! Joy and excitement are everywhere! Well, not everywhere. You and I both know that there are a lot of hurting people at Christmas time. A lot of…
Grief is an emotion that can overwhelm you. Grief can take many forms from denial, anger, fatigue and depression. Here are a few tips on identifying grief in your life…
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the…
Four of my closest friends are widows. Jennifer, a pastor’s wife, lost her godly spouse after his long, grueling bout with brain cancer. My friend Eileen walked into her bedroom…
PSALM 23 David, the author of Psalm 23, illustrates the relational and covenantal nature of God from the vantage point of a shepherd taking care of his sheep. Just as…
Do you feel isolated and lonely? God made us to need each other! Did you know that every time a lion pride hunts together it is a lightly organized operation?…
Jim Roan, an American entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker said, “Your life doesn’t get better by chance. It gets better by change.” If that is true, why is it so hard…
Dear Roger, I recently attended the funeral of one of my best friends. As I listened to the comments, I was surprised by how many people weren’t really…
Some of the best advice I’ve heard about how to deal with people who are grieving is to walk softly around a broken heart. Brokenhearted people need hope, and hope…
“Wilson, where are you? Wilson! Wilson! I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Wilson. Wilson, I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Wilson! I can’t!” If you’ve seen Cast Away, this scene is etched in your…
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Colossians 3:12 (NIV) Painting was the last thing I expected to be doing…
What do you look for when you look for a church that is a good fit for you? Maybe it’s the music? Maybe it’s the preaching? Maybe it’s the children’s…
Our Psalm today, 88, is probably the darkest of all of them, and therefore to our ears, it will feel like the strangest worship song ever. But obviously it is…
The last thing we want someone to say about us is that we are “super needy.” We want to be independent, self-sufficient, strong individuals. The idea of needing people and…
These are hard days for minorities. I have also asked several African American friends what it’s like to see so much tension and a rise in racial profiling and violence.…
“They do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34 Thirty-seven years old. Thin, almost frail. Balding and bespectacled. An electronics buff. Law-abiding and tired. Certainly not a description you…
What are our sources of fear? From where do they originate? Past hurts can lead to present fear. Any traumatic event-a painful divorce, a car accident, a debilitating illness can…
It would soon be Mother’s Day again, and I was dreading it. I wasn’t dreading the day for myself, but for my children who had lost their mother Cindy and…
What do you do when you feel that the world has gathered against you? The hardest thing you ever do is to wait in God’s promises and rest. That’s where…
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and…
All of us have our weak moments in life–those moments when we doubt ourselves, our ability and our resources available to help us face up to the challenges of simply…
A mother asked, “Where have you been?” Her little girl replied, “On my way home I met a friend who was crying because she had broken her doll.” “Oh,”…
Dear Roger, I’ve been having some really serious health problems and one of my Christian friends recommended that I read the book of Job. That was the worst advice I’ve…
“Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. And Elkenah, her husband, said to her, ‘Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart…
At many points after a loss, the mourning person can benefit from the support of others. Individual grief reactions can vary widely from person to person and also within the…
My best friend Abby was widowed at 44. Her husband John passed away from sleep apnea. He was healthy. No warning. Four little faces greeted Mom at the breakfast table.…
You probably have a love/hate relationship with apologies. You appreciate it deeply when others apologize to you. But you find it difficult to apologize to others. And let me guess,…
Dear Roger, I have studied Scriptures about angels in the Bible, but there doesn’t seem to be much information about how angels interact with us. How can we actually know…
Lysa TerKeurst explains that the key to surviving pain is laying your sufferings before God: “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” James 4:8a (NKJV) Does it…
Where have you been? the mother demanded. The little girl replied, “On my way home, I met a friend who was crying because she had broken her doll.” “Oh,” said…
Dear Roger, My mom passed away a few months ago. Can she hear me in heaven when I talk to her? Sincerely, Brian Dear Brian, No one can answer your…
“Don’t look now,” said Steve, our associate pastor of counseling. “I see Don Perry sitting with his fourth wife. Wives one and three just walked up the aisle and sat…
Anger is a God-given emotion. Which of these statements about anger is true? “I should never allow myself to become angry.” “Anger can become a sin, and that’s okay.” “The…
I have a number of letters each week from people around the world who are contemplating suicide. Here are a few thoughts that might help you in dealing with someone…
Dear Roger, In the past, I have been a part of many short term missions’ trips both at home in the U.S. and abroad in foreign countries. Lately however,…
Dear Roger, Please help me! My family and I belong to a church were cliques are always formed- even the leadership seem to be encouraging it. I’ve held on for…
And when death arrives on our doorstep, he brings all his friends along with him; sorrow, despair, pain, loneliness, depression, addiction, confusion, bitterness, anger and of course grief.
Hi Roger, How can I impact someone else’s life without harassing them with religion? I have many friends that don’t believe in God and many of them find it…
Do you wonder why your church is not growing? Have you ever read Acts 15? It’s right between Acts 14 and Acts 16! Many people find themselves skipping the chapter,…
Dear Roger, Did God predestine people to go to Hell? Sincerely, PH Dear PH, Let me begin with an overview of predestination as envisioned by John Calvin. Calvinism teaches,…
After a loss, each member of a family has his or her own unique grief process. But just as important and unique is the grief experience of the entire family…
Our God stands unchanging through time as the source of our strength. The power of same is the culmination of our consistency with Him. If you resist the monotonous, you’ll…
The heart of God working in the heart of man doesn’t look the same on everyone when it happens. But whether in the quiet stirrings of our spirit or in…
Easter is the joyful climax of the liturgical year. You can’t top Jesus jumping out of the grave, stomping Satan’s ugly head and forgiving our filthy sins. The whole Bible…
Part of serving a ministry in a foreign country is to identify the chief value(s) of your host country so that you will know what you should and shouldn’t do…
Leading is a difficult task whether you are in the secular world or in church. Leaders must stay sharp if they want to be faithful to the task God has…
King David experiences rejection, grief, abandonment, guilt, humiliation and disappointment during his lifetime. In his psalms, David examines the darkness in his life only to discover victory with God. These…
For thousands of years, the relationship had been perfect. As far back as any one could remember, the moon had faithfully reflected the sun’s rays into the dark night. It…
God encourages us with His grace: promise, pardon and power. Because of the encouragement of God and others, we can live abundant lives.
I’ve never been a fan of Winnie-the-Pooh. Or Tigger. Or Piglet. Tigger was always too spastic. Piglet too nervous. And Pooh, just too pooh. But Eeyore? He was my kind…
The story of Paul and Ananias teaches us much about healing relational scars. Take your hurt and be honest in the presence of God. Articulate your pain and anger to…
One of my pastor-mentors said, “When sex is good, it’s great. But when sex in bad, it’s still pretty good!” A good observation, but the Bible has more to say…
Singing sensation Taylor Swift sold four million records last year. Among her best current songs are “You Belong with Me” and “Two is Better than One.” The Bible tells us…
Singing sensation Taylor Swift sold four million records last year. Among her best current songs are “You Belong with Me” and “Two is Better than One.” The Bible tells us…
How can we honor the Lord on his Birthday according to the Bible? In Philippians 2:5-7, Paul writes that Jesus came down to earth as a servant and made himself…
The quality of our relationships with our children determines the weight of our influence. Regardless of their ages, we must never lose this influence to nurture and guide them. Children…
Only by having a proper view of God can we comprehend the reason for suffering. Suffering allows us to comfort others, to learn our own insufficiencies and God’s sufficiency. When…
Life sometimes hurts. We heal hurt with comfort, anger with forgiveness, guilt with confession, fear with perfect love and condemnation with God’s unconditional love and acceptance.
We all have up and down days. God wants us to rejoice together and comfort each other when we are hurting. Comforters come uninvited, openly express the depths of their…
Every Christian will eventually be wounded in church. How do we heal? By recognizing Satan’s schemes, facing issues with honesty, comfort, forgiveness and love.
Jesus, in His humanity, demonstrated that we all need friends. He was despised, so His disciples showed Him love and respect. He was rejected, so His small group gave Him…
Dear Roger, I moved to a new place a year ago this past June 11th. Since I moved here, I have met many people and have friends that don’t believe…
Pastor Roger Barrier and daughter Brianna Barrier Engeler describe unique stressors on pastor’s children. Pastor’s kids can be helped by their parents when they demonstrate realistic expectations, empathy and right…
FRIENDSHIPS ARE ESSENTIAL TO LIFE From the beginning, in the Garden of Eden, God declared, “It is not good for man to be alone” even though He walked in fellowship…