People deal with sexual abuse in different ways. One common method is denial or complete forgetfulness. The memories of the past are so traumatic or painful that a person can only continue to function by blocking the memories from the mind. Unfortunately, even though they’re blocked out, they’re really not gone. These memories must be dealt with in order for the person to be healed.
Our enemy, Satan, will use these things which are buried deep in a person’s mind to make him or her feel rejected, worthless, unloved, and hopeless. The first step in being healed is to recognize that you were a victim. In no way were you responsible for what happened to you, regardless of your age when you were abused, who was involved in your abuse, what the person told you, or the circumstances surrounding your abuse. When you accept the fact that in no way did you cause the abuse, then you can refuse to accept the condemnation Satan tries to hold over you.
The second step is to acknowledge that God did not want this abuse to occur. Although He could have stepped in and prevented it, He did not, because He gave each person a free will to choose righteousness or to choose sin. When a person chooses sin, innocent people suffer. God grieves over man’s sin and His heart is compassionate toward the hurting. Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
We have mentioned how some people deal with the memories by suppression. At some point in a person’s life these memories surface. This is God’s way of saying, “Now is the time I have ordained for you to deal with your past.” Trying to suppress these memories will only make the healing process more difficult and take longer. God wants us to experience the abundant life that Jesus promises in John 10:10.
Some people are more aware of their emotional wounds than others, but all who have been victims of sexual abuse suffer to some degree. God sees our emotional wounds just as much as He sees our physical wounds. Like a splinter which must be dug out in order to prevent infection, so abuse must be dealt with in order for healing to take place. Physical pain is involved in digging out the splinter, just as emotional pain is involved in dealing with abuse, and dealing with it God’s way ultimately brings healing.
God has many ways He can heal—through His Word, Christian books and music, prayer, praise, Scripture meditation, and even tears. He may lead you to share your memories with someone–either a professional Christian counselor or another trusted Christian friend, mentor, pastor or teacher. As much as you may want to be healed of your memories, recognize that Jesus wants it even more. He said that He came to bind up those who are bruised (Luke 4:18).
I hope you’re spending time each day reading your Bible and praying. Doing these things can draw you close to the Lord, causing you to trust and love Him more as you understand His ways. The Word of God is powerful in bringing about changes in our lives. Psalm 107:20 says that God sent forth His Word and healed them. The written Word is the Bible, and the living Word is Jesus. As you spend time each day reading the Bible and praying, you are drawing upon a very real source of strength, both the written and living Word.
Forgiveness is a very important principle in the Christian walk. Carrying unforgiveness can cause a real blockage in your relationship with the Lord. Do you feel that you have forgiven the person or persons who caused your pain? Forgiveness is not easy, but it is possible in the Lord’s strength. We forgive, not because we feel like it, but because it is commanded in the Bible. If we do not forgive others of their sins, then God does not forgive us of ours, according to Matthew 6:15. Ask the Lord to give you His strength and grace to forgive those whom He places on your heart, and be obedient to follow His leading.
You can walk in confidence with God. You can lead a full and victorious life, emotionally whole and healthy. Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus came to give us an abundant life. The power of God is greater than the power of the enemy (1 John 4:4). God is able to do more than you could possibly imagine (Ephesians 3:20). Trust in and lean on His Word. The Lord loves you very, very much, and He is able!
If you have prayed and feel led of the Lord to seek professional Christian counseling, we encourage you to seek someone who has experience in dealing with victims of sexual abuse. If you do not know of a Christian counselor in your area, you may want to find a name through the following link for the American Association of Christian Counselors. Please know that we are not personally familiar with these counselors, so we cannot give personal recommendations for individual counselors. http://www.aacc.net
http://www.josh.org. Used by permission.