In this message, we’re digging into a subject that hits close to home for many people. In fact, it’s one of the biggest reasons people leave the church. We’re talking about what to do when Christians let you down and how you can heal from past hurts.
www.lifechurch.tv/open. Used by permission.
Recently one of the members of our connection group courageously poured out her heart. She felt disconnected from God and bruised by a challenging season of life. “How can I feel like God isn’t so distant?” What a profound question..
The next day I was texting back and forth with another member of the group who was also struggling spiritually. “I’m working through some stuff,” he said, “and it’s not going very well. I figured it probably best for me to put my head down and stay busy. I’m kind of a mess and don’t want to get any of it on anyone else.” I hear and feel that. When I am discouraged and struggling, I tend to act just like this brother. I pull away from relationships. I withdraw and try to sort out my mess until I’m ready to re-emerge.
Most American Christians tend to think about spiritual disciplines and formation in a private context. We think about our quiet times (or you might call it devotional time or time in the Word) as a solitary affair: just us, our Bible, and God. Certainly, such alone time with God is an essential aspect of our spiritual life. Jesus, after all, “…would withdraw to desolate places and pray” (Luke 5:16). This is a practice that we ought to practice.
And yet.
We have tended to over-individualize our spirituality in the West. For many of us, the most vulnerable parts of our faith are separated off from community. As I read the Bible, it seems to me that most of the spiritual practices are done in community.
As I read In Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, for example, I see Paul inviting us together to be built into “a holy temple in the Lord,” (Eph 2:21b) “a dwelling place for God by the Spirit” (Eph 2:22b). It is through the church “the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known” (Eph 3:10). It is in the context of our relationship with “all the saints” that we “know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God” (Eph 3:19). For the purpose of “the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph 4:3) that Christ gives us gifts. As we faithfully offer our gifting to one another we “attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood” (Eph 4:13). We speak truth in love to one another, exposing the ignorant schemes of the world.
In community we encourage one another, and we forgive one another. We reject the corrupted patterns of worldly living and speak into one another God’s truths “in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord.” And in all of these things we submit “to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Eph 5:21).
Community is the context of vibrant and growing faith. God doesn’t tell us the only way we ought to be praying or reading his Word is individually. On the contrary! God invites us to step into community.
Studies show that people are much more likely to follow through on commitments to exercise and eat healthier when they do so with a partner. I’ve found the same to be true for my spiritual disciplines. While I daily read the Bible alone and pray alone, I find tremendous joy in reading the Bible as a family and praying as a family.
Let me offer a few tips to help you make your devotional time communal, depending on your age and stage of life.
For singles: I have several single friends who have daily or weekly Facetime calls with close friends to read the Bible and pray together. I know other singles who meet up weekly for coffee and time in the Word. I know of others who have group text strands for the purpose of prayer and biblical encouragement. Don’t feel like you have to do some big production to make this happen. Just open up the Word, start reading it to one another, talk about it, and pray through it.
For just marrieds: I would recommend you protect time over breakfast or dinner to open up the Bible and pray together daily.
For young families: Usually bedtime is the perfect intimate setting to read the Bible (I recommend Sally Lloyd-Jones’s The Jesus Storybook Bible or Kevin DeYoung’s The Biggest Story or The Action Bible). Find their gospel love language. Sing songs together and pray over your children each night before they go to bed. Make sure your children feel the joy and warmth of the gospel. So much more important than content is that they feel the loving embrace and care of their Savior.
For growing families: Once your kids hit eight and older, coordinating schedules becomes more challenging. Evening commitments and activities can make nighttime routines tricky to navigate around. I know that these were the most challenging years for us as a family to have regular times in the Word and prayer together. You might want to consider waking the kids up 15 or 20 minutes earlier to have family devotionals over breakfast..
For families with teens: Similarly, the growing number of commitments can be an obstacle to creating healthy rhythms. For our family, devotions over breakfast protect our time in the Word, prayer, and worship together. I know other families who protect one evening a week for a longer time in the Word and worship.
For empty nesters: Re-set rhythms together, whether in the morning or evening. Find ways to make spiritual disciplines fun and fresh. Use your freedom to enjoy times of prayer in nature and with new groups. If you are financially able to do so, make travel plans to Israel or Europe that place you in the steps of those in Scripture.
I offer these encouragements to you not as an obligation, but as an invitation. We aren’t made to walk this world alone. Christ has given us himself, his Word, and one another. Let us lean into Christ together, growing in faith and trust in community.
As born-again believers, we are all new creations in Christ. Although we may not always feel like it or act like it, Scripture clearly teaches that we have a new identity: we are children of God (see 1 John 3:1-3) and no longer children of wrath (see Ephesians 2:1-3). This immediate spiritual transformation and continuing growth will be easier for us to understand if we are familiar with a particular agricultural technique that is used in the semitropical climate zones where a frost can severely damage citrus crops.
In these regions, horticulturists have learned to use the bitter-tasting ornamental orange as rootstock because it can take a moderate freeze without damage. When the ornamental orange tree has grown to the right stage, they cut the stem just above the ground and graft in a sweet orange, such as a navel orange. The new growth above the graft has a new nature.
Nobody looks at a navel orange grove and says, “Actually, all those trees are nothing but rootstock.” They were at one time, but they no longer are. Now, people identify the orchard by the type of fruit the trees are bearing. The same is true for us. Jesus said, “By their fruit you will recognize them” (Matthew 7:16). Believers are identified for who they are “in Christ,” not for who they were “in Adam.”
“Suckers,” or small green sprouts, can continue to grow from the old roots, but they need to be trimmed off. If they are allowed to grow, they will divert the growth of the tree away from the new graft. In the same way, the gardener cuts off every branch that does not bear fruit and prunes every branch that is bearing fruit so it may bear even more (see John 15:2).
We have been grafted into Christ, and He will prune away our old nature that doesn’t bear fruit. This transformation from who we were “in Adam” to whom we are now “in Christ” may be summarized as follows:
In Adam: Old self (Col.3:9) by birth In Christ: New self (Col. 3:10)
In Adam: Sin nature (Eph. 2:1-3) by nature In Christ: Participate in the divine nature (2 Pet. 1:4)
In Adam: Live according to the sinful nature (flesh; Rom. 8:5a) by choice In Christ: Live in accordance with the Spirit or flesh (Rom. 8:5b; Gal. 5:13-23)
The apostle Paul consistently identifies the believer according to who they are in Christ and never identifies them by their old nature/flesh. “From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh” (2 Corinthians 5:16, ESV). In other words, we shouldn’t perceive other believers as natural people who derive their identity from their physical origin and natural existence.
Returning to the tree illustration, that which grows above the graft has only one nature, but the total tree has two natures (rootstock and navel). The believer still lives in a mortal body and is confronted with the choice of living according to the old sinful nature (flesh) or living according to the Spirit. However, the apostle Paul says, “Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:24). We are new creations in Christ, and we belong to Him. Someday, we will leave our physical body, receive a resurrected body and live forever—with only one righteous nature—in the presence of God.
When a navel orange is grafted into an ornamental orange, the tree takes on a new identity. How is the same true when when we are grafted into Christ?
Small green sprouts called “suckers” can divert the growth of a tree from the new graft. How is this similar to what can happen in our lives?
Why shouldn’t believers identify themselves as sinners, alcoholics, addicts, co-dependents, and the like?
In what way is God pruning your life so that you may bear more fruit?
What labels have you worn that are not consistent with who you really are?
Here we are explicitly told what the walk of believers entails: the walk “in love,” the imitation of God and of Christ, who loved with a love beyond compare. Having Jesus Christ as both the ground and model of love (Eph 5:2), such self-sacrificial love is to be the mark of believers, the “beloved” children of God (5:1). Ephesians 5:1-20
Imitation of God and Christ’s selfless love (divine love).
After this grand model of love has been introduced, Paul turns to contrast the behavior of believers and unbelievers (5:3–20). The illegitimate and illicit love of the world is the point of difference, as well as the self-indulgence of unbelievers (“greed,” 5:3). With “immorality” heading the list, it appears that the rest of the vices are colored by this sense of sexual misconduct. Such attitudes and actions are entirely antithetical to God and to the imitation of God/Christ who loved with a perfect love. Therefore, these vices are not even to be named among Christians (5:3).
In all likelihood, the kinds of speech indicated in 5:4 are also related to “immorality” that head the vice list in 5:3: thus, immoral utterances. Abstaining from these kinds of immoral speech, believers are to engage in thanksgiving. Unlike self-satisfying unbelievers, believers are conscious of the self-giving of God, his goodness and generosity in Christ. So, rather than engage in obscenities and vulgarities, they express thanks to their Creator and Redeemer, the ultimate source of all their blessings. Because Paul is dealing with the character and lifestyle of unbelievers (as opposed to that of the “saints,” 5:3), 5:5 is a reaffirmation that these unbelievers have no inheritance (i.e., rewards) in the kingdom of Christ and God, a danger that could also affect believers, incurring the wrath of God (5:6; though not loss of salvation, of course).
Imitation of God and Christ’s selfless love (divine love). Abandonment of sexual immorality (worldly love) and avoiding the anger of God.
No longer “sons of disobedience” (5:6), believers are to live/walk as “children of light” (5:8): children characterized by light in the Lord, since they imitate God who is light. The fruit produced by believers—goodness, righteousness, and truth—reflects God himself; this essentially is an exhortation for them to be godly (5:9), that they may please the Lord (5:10). The ethical demands of a believer’s lifestyle are clear. They, living in the realm of light, in Christ, live to a different code, follow an exalted standard, and thus influence a dark world.
Imitation of God and Christ’s selfless love (divine love). Abandonment of sexual immorality (worldly love) and avoiding the anger of God, instead walking as light and winning the pleasure of God.
There are three contrasts that dominate 5:15–20, each employing “not …, but …”: unwise vs. wise walking (5:15), becoming foolish vs. understanding the Lord’s will (5:17), and getting drunk with wine vs. being filled by the Spirit (5:18)—the last evidenced by worship (God-ward) and submission (man-ward; 5:21–6:9). The three contrasts are likely to be parallel.
Ephesians 5:18–21 is a single sentence that has five anarthrous (i.e., without articles) participles modifying the main imperative verb “be filled” (5:18): “speaking,” “singing,” “making melody,” “giving thanks,” and “submitting.” They are likely to be participles of means, the manner in which the imperative of 5:18 regarding filling by the Holy Spirit may be actualized—and that is by “speaking,” “singing,” “making melody,” “giving thanks” (these four may conveniently be characterized as elements of worship) and “submitting” (dealt with in the next pericope). Thus, worship and submission, encompassing the exhortations of the five participles and describing the manifestation of “filling” by the Spirit, are appropriate engagements for a body that is “a holy temple in the Lord” and “a dwelling of God in the Spirit” (2:21–22). What believers are being filled with is the fullness of God in Christ (mediated) by the Spirit, a state of being under the Spirit’s control.
Believers, increasingly conformed to Christ in faith by the Spirit, and comprehending, in community, the immensity of Christ’s love, glorify God who dwells in them. Ephesians 3:14-21
This pericope is the continuation of Ephesians 2:11–22 (after which came the “digression” of 3:1–13). There, Paul had concluded by saying that believers have been recreated as a holy temple, the dwelling of God (2:20–22). Here we find out how they should function as this “temple,” and “holy dwelling” of God.
Paul, the one who became part of God’s grand purpose by the “working of his power” (3:7), now prays God will grant his readers to be “strengthened with power” (3:16). In other words, God wants the Ephesians to join in with him in this divine plan for the cosmos, as he empowers them for this purpose.
But how are they to play their part? The structure of the pericope is focused upon the love of Christ:
A every (pas) family (3:14–15)
B strengthened with power (dynamis) (3:16)
C that Christ may dwell; rooted and founded in love (3:17)
D breadth and length and height and depth (3:18)
C’ love of Christ (3:19)
B’ to Him who is able (dynamai); according to the power (dynamis) (3:20)
A’ to all (pas) generations (3:21)
There are three purpose-clauses here: “that he may grant …” (3:16), “that you might be able …” (3:18), and “that you may be filled …” (3:19), each building on the preceding one. Empowerment by the Spirit for Christ’s indwelling (3:16–17; this is not the event that occurs at justification, but the ongoing indwelling and manifestation of Christ that occurs with sanctification: Christ being formed in the believer) leads to a comprehension of Christ’s love in the context of community, where alone, the magnitude of Christ’s love may be experienced visibly and tangibly. Thus, there is an imperatival element here, the exhortation of believers to be active in love for one another. This comprehension (and expression) of love, in turn, leads to the church being filled to the fullness of God, thus glorifying God and becoming the temple/holy dwelling of God it was intended to be (3:21–22; 2:20–22). In the OT, the construction of the tabernacle and the temple were followed by their filling with divine glory (Exodus 25–31, 35–40 and 40:34–35; 1 Kgs 5–9 and 1 Kgs 8:10–11); so also, here in the NT (Eph 2:19–22 and 3:16–19). There is clearly an implication in this pericope that the fullness and glory of God is manifest in this temple of his people as they experience and express the multi-dimensional love of Christ.
The thrust of this pericope is that through the power of the Spirit and in faith, believers are increasingly conformed to Christ (his indwelling them). Thus they are able, as they live in community, to comprehend the immeasurable extent of Christ’s love. Their conformation to Christ’s image enables this love—manifested in community—to grow and flourish. And through all this, they become, more and more, the temple of God, his fullness in them. And thus God is glorified by the body of Christ.
Believers, once in dire straits, but now sharing Christ’s exaltation, demonstrate to the universe God’s mercy, love, grace, and kindness as they undertake good works. Ephesians 2:1-10
Prior to regeneration, the sphere of the Ephesians’ life was governed by evil influences (Eph 2:2–3), so much so, unbelievers are referred to as “sons of disobedience.” These are people characterized by disobedient lives. They are rebels against God, and their fate is divine punishment: the “sons of disobedience” become “children of wrath” (2:3). A total pervasiveness of sin in every aspect of pre-Christian life is characteristic of such people “by nature” (2:3): humanity is born dead to God.
Verses 5–6 contain the three main verbs of the single sentence of 2:1–7, describing three divine operations, each prefixed with the Greek preposition syn- (“with,” translated as the prefix “co-”): synezōopoiēsen, synēgeiren, and synekathisen (“co-enlivened,” “co-raised,” and “co-seated”; 2:5, 6). All three indicate identification “with” Jesus Christ with whom believers were made alive, raised, and seated. The point is reinforced by “with Christ” and “in Christ” in 2:5, 6. The similarities between the raising up and seating of Christ and that of believers are striking (1:20; 2:6). This is a shared destiny: what is true of Christ, is also true of believers!
A number of contrasts are visible within 2:1–10 that develop the pericope’s thrust: “dead” in sin (2:1, 5) vs. “co-enlivened” (2:5); following the “course of this world” and the dictates of evil entities (2:2) vs. being related intimately to Christ and exalted with him in the heavenlies (2:5–6); and God’s wrath (2:3) vs. God’s mercy, love, grace, and kindness (2:4, 5, 7). There has also been a change of lineage: from doomed “by nature” (2:3) to exalted “in Christ” (2:5–6).
The referent of “this” in 2:8 (and implied in 2:9) is best seen as referring to the entire process of God’s saving work. God’s glorious salvation is, all of it, a gift from God. Paul pointedly makes it clear by a deviation from normal word order: 2:8c literally has “of God the gift,” thus juxtaposing “of yourselves” with “of God”—making 2:8bc read: “and this not of yourselves, of God the gift.”
This salvation wrought by God was a public demonstration, even proof (endeiknymi, “to show/prove,” 2:7), of divine grace and kindness—an eternal display on a cosmic scale. Thus, God’s concern is not restricted to individuals or even to the community of his people; it involves the whole of creation. All of this is part of the consummation of all things in Christ (1:9–10), for the glory of God (1:6, 12, 14).
“Workmanship” (poiēma, 2:10), is used elsewhere by Paul in Rom 1:20 for the creation of the universe. Here, then, is a second creation, of sorts, in Eph 2:10. In fact, the verb used here, ktizō (“create”), is employed in Ephesians only for the first creation of the universe (3:9) and for this second creation of a new peoples (here and in 2:15; 4:24)—both works of God.
This pericope, 2:1–10, is bounded on either side by peripatein, “to walk/live” (in 2:2 and 2:10). Thus, there is also the contrast in lifestyles between those who once “walked” in the evil way (2:1–2), and those who are now to “walk” in God’s way (2:10). Notice the parallels (following the word order in the Greek text): 2:1–2 has “in transgressions and sins … in which you formerly walked”; and 2:10 has “for good works … in them we may walk.” Thus, though salvation is not “of works” (2:9), the outcome is “for … works” (2:10), already prepared by God for his people to undertake. This is the future role of believers as they participate in God’s magnificent scheme for the cosmos in Christ. This is why God acted in grace to save them.
This post was written by Dillon Smith, a Gen-Z team member at CareyNieuwhof.com who lives in Omaha, Nebraska. We’re so grateful to the Citylight team for making the time to share what they’re learning with us.
I’ve always had a hard time with small groups as a church leader.
In my experience, whenever a church launches a new wave of small groups, you’re really hoping to just keep most of the people that show up on week 1 through week 10.
Usually, you launch with groups of 20 and are happy if you have groups of 8 by the end of the semester.
You might have had a similar experience.
As a result of this, I’ve grown a bit cynical about small group ministries. I’ve even had the thought that…
“Maybe small groups are just a bad idea. We could put people in serve groups instead.”
And I almost gave in to that thinking. But there was one problem with my theory:
To help you understand my struggle with groups, let me share my experience with Citylight. They’re a church here in Omaha that I’ve never regularly attended, but have watched grow from the outside.
Since they launched 9 years ago, they’ve grown from a small group praying in a living room into a family of 13 churches, have thousands of weekly attendees, and are reaching a huge number of young people.
As a Gen-Z outsider who asks a lot of questions, I’ve noticed a constant flow of everyday young Christians telling me how much they love their City Groups, and have heard a lot stories of people I know coming to Jesus in City Groups.
As a result, I’ve had to ask:
In a time where most churches are losing people (especially young adults) to atheism, agnosticism, or just being a “none”, how is Citylight having so much success?
I went in and asked their team some deeper questions.
To deter some objections I know I’ll get in the comments about megachurches, I want to start with some things Citylight doesn’t do.
They don’t:
Citylight actually has much more of an acoustic, chill vibe that could be replicated by a church with almost any budget and some high-quality musicians.
In my experience of talking with various Citylight members and staff over the last 8 years, I’d say they’re MORE intense than most churches on doctrine and theology.
A couple of their volunteers were actually the first people who explained to me what a Calvinist/Arminian or a TULIP was, and I wasn’t even attending.
As far as I can tell, they have a similar amount of transfer growth as the average growing church here in the City.
And I would add this: A lot of the transfer growth I have seen to Citylight has resulted in those Christians becoming much more engaged and healthy followers of Jesus.
That’s a win in my mind.
Not all transfer growth is bad. Sometimes it’s a good thing when a toxic church loses some of its members to a healthier church.
What’s setting them apart?
2 Words: City Groups
Obviously, they have great preaching, great culture, a rockstar team, real devotion to serving Jesus, and full acknowledgment that God is the one that deserves the glory for their growth.
Those have become the price of admission to being a growing church.
But, the final 20% that sets them apart is how their missional City Groups have been prioritized and organized since they launched.
So what sets the City Group model apart?
After interviewing their team, I see 6 things that make City Groups succeed and grow, when most small group ministries are fighting an uphill battle:
At the end of this post, I outline 4 more non-small-group-related principles that your church can use to reach more people:
When you and I think of a small group, we think of a group of people coming together in community to do a bible study in one of the member’s house or at a local coffee shop.
In this model, we usually stop at community and learning.
City Groups go beyond community and are intentionally creating missional communities that multiply disciples.
When a City Group comes together, they will decide their own mission.
Some examples they shared with me were:
In a City Group, the group isn’t the mission, their mission field is. And while most small groups focus on knowledge and friendship, City Groups go beyond and focus on mission and discipleship. (Are you starting to notice some similarities with the early church yet?)
I think the old way of thinking made total sense to consumer Christianity, but as Carey has repeatedly pointed out, consumer Christianity is dying.
So is the “let’s have a fun bible study” model of small groups.
So many churches and student ministries struggle with finding enough leaders for small groups. I’ve been there.
I was shocked to hear just how selective Citylight is when they are selecting group leaders.
As far as I can tell it isn’t any easier than a job interview you’d have anywhere else.
They interview you, learn about your family, and hunt down references in the searching process.
As a result of this, they don’t have a very high turnover rate for leaders, and are even able to tell what kind of people would be best to send to which group.
So here’s a thought:
If you wouldn’t hire them onto your staff, don’t let them lead a small group.
In our interview, the Citylight team told me about their 10-week-long Citygroup launch training that they take every City Group leader through.
No, that’s not a typo. 10 weeks.
In those 10 weeks, they resource their leaders with everything they will need to lead a missional community that multiplies disciples.
I couldn’t possibly outline everything that they cover in this post, but you can download their City Group Leadership Guide here to get a better idea.
They also have a City Group Resources page on their website that those leaders can return to again and again to stay sharp on things like:
This page is outstanding. If you get nothing else from this blog post, please check out this page (especially the discipleship resources.)
Another remarkable thing about City Groups is that they don’t want any group to have just one leader.
Their goal is that every City Group has a leadership team of individuals who share different portions of leadership.
Those different roles are: Up Leaders, In Leaders, and Out Leaders.
Here’s a screenshot from page 8 of the City Groups manual that outlines what those positions are:
An incompetent or toxic leader can kill a small group if they’re the only leader. This framework ensures that doesn’t happen.
On that same City Group Resources page is something called the “City Group Pathway”
According to their site;
The Pathway is a one year plan to establish discipleship rhythms for a City Group to know, love, and worship Jesus in the context of spiritual formation, community, and mission.
This pathway gives every City Group a development path to follow to grow into a healthy, missional community that is multiplying disciples.
No small group accidentally gets more effective at reaching people over time. It takes a clear path to follow, and intentionality from the entire group.
This might be the single biggest reason that City Groups are working so well.
When Citylight launched, they put just as much importance on being in a City Group as attending Sunday morning services.
City Groups weren’t an afterthought, they were a primary focus of the church since day one.
This is the opposite of what I’m seeing from most churches. Usually, small groups are secondary to Sunday morning.
But if you treat small groups as secondary, your people will do the same.
When it comes to small groups, you need to be ALL IN or ALL OUT.
If you don’t disciple people well in groups, focus on doing discipleship another way.
While I have you, there are a few non-City Group related things that a lot of growing churches (Including Citylight) do that I’m really impressed with:
I agree with what Kayle Stoecklein (whose husband Andrew died by suicide as a lead pastor) argued in her interview on Carey’s podcast, the job is just too big for one person to handle flawlessly.
I don’t think a Citylight church has ever been planted with only 1 Lead Pastor. They always have 2 lead pastors sharing the role.
I absolutely LOVE this model.
You can hear a bit more about this in this ChurchPulse Weekly episode.
They exist to gather (on Sunday) and scatter (in Citygroups). Nothing else.
They outline this pretty well on their home page here.
There is also a great podcast with one of their lead pastors here.
Citylight doesn’t have any massive online presence like Elevation or Life.Church, but, there are 2 things that I see working really well for them online:
1. By prioritizing the development and discipleship of their people, they have created an army of individual Christians that are living out their Christian lives online.
So, rather than one big church online presence, they have thousands of individuals who are leveraging their online presence for the kingdom every day.
2. They have an outstanding website that does a fantastic job of enabling their City Groups to grow and develop.
I’ve talked about this a lot already, but the more I dig into their website, the more impressed I am.
What if your website was a place for equipping, and not just attracting people?
Carey and I have both talked about this a lot (here, here, and here, for example.)
If you want to lead anything successful:
Life.Church, Connexus, Citylight, and Elevation are all examples of what happens when a church gets this right.
Our words and actions tell the truth of what we believe. If that statement is true—and I believe it is—then is Christ honestly replicated in everything we say and do?
We live in a physical world bursting with things that speak to the senses. It’s real if we can touch it, smell it, taste, feel and measure it. For the average person, if it’s not material, it doesn’t exist. But our faith requires us to believe in a God we “hope for,” one we “do not see.” To “live by faith, not by sight.”
When we really examine the truth, we don’t always live the sort of faith the Bible teaches. We understand what God’s Word says and we may even think we’re living according to it, but there are few of us who actually exercise and execute pure Biblical Christianity—a life of complete obedience to God.
Studies over the past decade by The Barna Research Group and others show that younger generations are looking for believers who are authentic and genuine. They want to see Christians live what they believe, and they have little time or respect for those who don’t.
Our lives should be a complete reflection of Christ. We should be people whose words and action match up with our faith.
How can we do this? Here are four intentional steps, I believe we can take, to help our faith become one that will solidify our belief in God, and declare it to others:
If you could do ONE THING and know that it would make a significant, lasting, possibly life-changing difference in your life, would you do it?
www.theintentionallife.com.
What is one way you have seen or experienced UNITY…?
Why would UNITY be important?
THE ORIGIN OF UNITY
Consider first, the distinct roles of the Godhead, yet their oneness…
Furthermore, we see it exemplified through Christ:
HOW UNITY IS MAINTAINED
Ephesians 4:1-3 “Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”
HUMILITY
GENTLENESS
PATIENCE
LOVE
THE PURPOSE FOR UNITY
MATURITY
Ephesians 4:11-16 “And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ. As a result:
but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.”
EVANGELISM
Jesus’ High Priestly Prayer –
CONCLUSION
How does the Gospel speak to UNITY today?
No GUILT…NO PRIDE…
We need the power of the Gospel, that is the Holy Spirit sent by Christ to invade every cavern of our soul….we can’t keep unity in the mind…we are lying to ourselves, it must be in the hands, feet, and mouth…
God help us!
From the time I was 21, I felt desperate to serve God. I remember praying fervently for him to use me: Here I am Lord, send me, and then I left the where and to whom up to him. Soon, when leaders at my church asked for volunteers to serve on a cleanup team, I said yes. When I was asked to help start a center for at-risk teens, I said yes. Even when it meant cleaning up vomit after a drunken teen lost it in front of me. That was the day I felt the Holy Spirit say, “Christine, this is what you’re going to spend your life doing—wiping up the vomit of a lost and a broken generation.” I was undone. I was right where I was supposed to be.
When my pastor said, “Christine, I want you to be the state director of our denomination’s youth movement, Youth Alive,” once again, I said yes. I was a single woman, called to be an evangelist, willing to serve in any way I could wherever I could.
As state director, I traveled country roads to a different town each week. I drove eight to nine hours one way to develop youth leaders, help build youth ministries, and speak at evangelistic rallies. While I faithfully walked out my yes, I never lost my wonder at seeing God save young people, and yet, there were times when I felt so alone and so in the dark. Times when I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d made the right decision. If I were in the right place. If I were doing the right thing.
I’m not sure what I had imagined my life to be—especially on the nights when I found myself couch surfing or officing out of my car, long before there were cell phones and laptops—and I couldn’t help but wrestle with my thoughts wondering if this was what the rest of my life would be. I had left a corporate job with lots of promise to step into ministry, only to find myself sometimes more alone than fulfilled, with more questions than answers. The whole concept of walking by faith and not by sight had sounded far more glamorous when I first said yes.
But in those early years, God was preparing me. Intentionally. In the dark. In obscurity. Where no one could see me—because that’s where we’re developed and truly prepared for what God has prepared for us.
Isn’t that what happened to King David in the Bible? He was a shepherd boy, tending his father’s sheep when the Prophet Samuel came looking for the next king of Israel. He was just a boy of 15 faithfully doing everything his father assigned him to do, and after Samuel anointed David, he went back to tending sheep. Twenty years later he was appointed king (1 Samuel 16:13: 2 Samuel 5:1-4). Can you imagine waiting 20 years to do something God’s anointed you to do? I can!
Technology may have almost caught up with the speed of light, but God’s processes never will. I understand that we live in a world where it seems everyone is waiting to be discovered, instead of developed. We live in an age of selfies and instant uploads, of Instagram celebrities and talent-discovering TV shows, but God’s idea of preparation is more like the years I spent in obscurity, living out one yes after another.
Looking back, I liken it to the multi-step process of developing photos in a dark room, something common only a decade ago: going into the darkroom, removing the film from the canister, stretching out the film, re-rolling it onto a reel that was submerged into the developer…and on the tedious process went, one chemical bath after another, developing one image after another. Slowly.
The difference between taking a selfie today and taking a picture years ago is astounding. And misleading. In our snap and upload world, we can begin to think our life is supposed to be just as quick. Just as instant. Just as miraculous. We can begin to think that stepping into our purpose, dreams, career track or ministry, should be faster, sooner, easier.
But it never will be. I have learned that like the old-fashioned way of developing film in a dark room, stepping into all that God’s called us to do is a process, one that often takes years in the making.
God’s always using our present to prepare us for our future. Always preparing us for what he’s prepared for us. Always working in us so he can work through us. Because he understands we need to be developed, not discovered, to move into all the plans and purposes he’s designed just for us.
www.propelwomen.org.
You know that people burn out. In fact, given the way you feel, you may have asked whether that’s what happening to you.
But here’s a deeper question.
Can a culture burn out?
And if the answer is yes, any chance that’s happening to America in this moment?
An accurate diagnosis might be helpful right now because, if you’re like me, as you read the news and scroll through your feed, it’s hard not to feel despair.
I was speaking to a group of next generation church leaders recently, most in their twenties or early thirties, and as I thought about their future, I was reminded of how pessimistic so many of the outlooks on the future are right now.
That’s when it hit me: It is possible for an entire culture to experience burn out, and is that, in fact, happening?
Between a pandemic, a fragile economy, racial injustice, climate instability, and very stressful election and political tone, it’s a very difficult moment.
Then the even bigger question: In light of all this, how do you minister to an exhausted, cynical culture?
If in fact, a country is showing signs of burnout, that does three things.
First, it provides an accurate diagnosis, which has value in itself. Not knowing what’s wrong makes it very difficult to make things right.
Second, a diagnosis points the way to treatment.
And third, it ultimately offers hope of recovery.
Which is my motivation in writing this post. Although I’m a Canadian, I’ve always had a deep affection for America and (until the pandemic impacted travel) spent a great deal of time there.
Many of my deep friendships and partnerships are with Americans, so the connections mean a lot to me. Add to that the fact that America is still such a global influencer, and we realize we all get better when America gets better. And we all suffer when America suffers.
So, what’s going on, and what can we do about it?
How do you minister to an exhausted, burned out culture?
Some Signs It May Be Burnout
I’m personally familiar with the challenge of burnout. Having burned out personally around the age of 40, I’m all too familiar with the symptoms and challenges associated with it.
Let me give you a partial, short list of what people go through when they experience burn out.
Given that a nation is the sum of its people, it’s good to look within to yourself and around to others. And when certain behaviors and characteristics are widespread enough to characterize a people, you could argue the culture is burning out.
So, what do you look for? While this is not a medical diagnosis, see if any of this sounds familiar.
Cynicism, a loss of passion and a pervasive numbness often signify burnout. To say we’ve grown cynical and grown numb as a culture is a bit of an understatement right now. And cynicism never finds a home in a healthy heart.
In addition to numbness, though, burnout can bring out disproportionate emotional responses like anger over things that shouldn’t normally make you angry. The weird combination of numbness to many things and a livid anger about other things is a classic sign of burnout. On that note, that’s exactly what your social media feed is right now—a strange combination of indifference and fury.
Other symptoms include loss of motivation (this will never get better, so what’s the point?) and the inability to think straight. When I burned out it was as though my mind stopped working…I just couldn’t form many logical thoughts. Taking a look at our culture right now, and it’s easy to see we’re not making great decisions, and the decisions we are making are often fueled by impulse, emotion and anger (see above).
A final sign worth noting is that people who are burning out often self-medicate. That usually takes the form of addiction.
The addiction can be something as ‘virtuous’ as work or food. For me, it was both of those things. I worked far too many hours and ate some of my feelings (which of course, just makes you feel worse). Other times you can get addicted to spending, gaming, binge watching, exercise or anything else that helps you numb out or escape.
And, of course, people also self-medicate through the use of alcohol, drugs, sex and gambling.
The fact that we’re a deeply addicted culture points to an inability to cope with the current reality. Which opens the door wide for healing and ministry.
So, what can you do to point toward a solution, rather than be part of the problem?
It’s not your imagination, your social media feed and news feed are hard to take right now.
While it’s important to stay connected and in touch as a leader, the main thing your social media and news feed do these days is feed your anxiety. What’s used to feed your mind and heart now just feeds your despair.
Which is why you need to drink from a deeper well.
Obviously, for Christians, that starts with scripture.
But in a fractious time, even reading the Bible can be one more way to find ammunition to attack the other side or prove your point. That’s just a bad use of the Bible.
Don’t let your news feed filter your reading of scripture. Let your reading of scripture filter your news feed. The former fuels anxiety. The latter diffuses it.
Another great practice right now is to anchor yourself in timeless truth. Go back to a favorite devotional book, spiritual classic or something that wasn’t written in the last 20 years.
Sages have made it through crises in the past. If you keep yourself anchored, so will you.
When a culture is wounded, ask yourself whether your chief goal is to bind the wound or aggravate it. Right now, it feels like many have gone beyond poking and into aggravation.
What if you just decided that your approach in life and online was going to be to bind wounds, not aggravate them?
To try to heal your enemies rather than harm them?
A simple way to begin is to ask this question: How can I help?
If what you’re about to say or do doesn’t help your neighbor, don’t say it and don’t do it.
Our world is looking for an alternative right now.
Deciding what you want to be known for is the first step in the right direction.
As my friend Jeff Henderson points out, most churches (and many church leaders) have been known for what they’re against. It’s much better to be known what you’re for.
Being against something takes almost no work. I personally find it easy to come up with almost instant criticism of almost anything.
So many people eating Doritos who have never once stepped foot on a field know how to manage an NFL team better than a head coach. Criticism is easy and often inaccurate.
It’s much harder to decide what you’re for. But that’s where all the value is.
Being for something will actually require something of you. Some effort, some principles, some sacrifice and perhaps some misunderstanding.
Church leaders make a mistake when they imagine that the scripture is mostly about things we’re against. It’s not.
It’s about things we’re for. The alternative community that emerged in the first century that was characterized by love, equality, generosity, sacrifice, caring for the marginalized and least important and the outward thrust of the Gospel reshaped the world and reshaped history.
The next generation today is looking for an alternative to hype and hate. They’re looking for hope.
The church is their best hope for finding that. If we focus on the things the early church focused on, they will.
This is a long, tiring journey we’re on.
The crisis everyone thought would last for a few months is dragging on with no end in sight. With chronic instability on the indefinite horizon, healthy leaders are the only leaders who are going to make it long term.
So, take care of yourself.
For years I ran on no reserves. You just can’t do that. And your vacation won’t save you.
Here’s why: Time off won’t heal you when the problem is how you spend time on. Most of us run at unsustainable pace, limping into our weekends and vacation hoping they’ll restore us. They won’t. A vacation can’t solve an unattainable pace. A sustainable pace can solve an unattainable pace.
The mantra I’ve lived by for the almost 15 years since my burnout is live in a way today that will help you thrive tomorrow. I’ve adjusted everything in my life to try to make sure that happens: My sleep, diet, exercise, time off, the kind of work I do and so much more.
So think about that: What do you need to do today so you can thrive tomorrow?
Cancel some meetings? Delegate a little more? Say no to some new opportunities? Go for a run? Get to bed early tonight? Stop drinking every night to relieve the stress? Take a nap? Get that workout in?
It’s probably a combination of all of that (and more).
If you don’t put some margin in your life today, you won’t have much of a tomorrow.
One of my personal values is ‘err on the side of generosity.’ I like being generous, not just financially, but in spirit, trying to give people the benefit of the doubt and including rather than excluding.
I’m also deeply concerned about confirmation bias and the echo chamber that social media algorithms create (I wrote about that here).
That said, I’ve unfollowed more people in the last year than in the last five years combined largely because they are fueling the anger rather than diffusing it. And no, I’m not talking about the racial justice discussion (I’ve actually followed that conversation more closely).
But the kind of people who are always stirring up controversy, magnifying division, and taking entrenched partisan (rather than principled) stands became such a distraction and agitation for me that unfollowing or muting seems to be the best option.
It’s difficult to think (and pray) deeply when you have people constantly yelling in your ear about their take on every issue whether it matters or not.
So, you may want to consider unfollowing or muting a few people. It’s hard to bring something positive if you constantly fill your mind with negatives.
It’s hard to bring peace if you only fill your mind with division.
www.careynieuwhof.com.
If you feel disconnected, hopeless, or you just know something is missing—it’s not the end of your story. It’s an opportunity to reconnect. To find hope. And to rediscover what you lost.
What might be missing maybe is just the power of community when iron sharpens iron, and together you strengthen, and lift, and love, and convict, and correct, and encourage each other. You can’t do it alone.
www.lifechurch.tv/open.
Today, the need I see for Christian boldness is a little different. It’s not so much that evangelicals are grasping for so-called “Christian America.” Rather, it’s our being drawn into the callout culture, the outrage culture, the cancel culture, the coddled culture. However you name it, it is very angry. And behind the relative safety of social media, it is very bold.
This boldness is seldom beautiful. But some Christian culture warriors are drawn into it and shaped by it, with the result that their boldness is distorted toward the brash, angry, contentious, coarse, snide, and obnoxious. What is needed is not less boldness. No. The world is not suffering from too much boldness in the cause of truth. Rather, what’s missing is the beauty of brokenhearted boldness.
Here at Desiring God, we believe that this brokenhearted boldness is not a personality trait, but a miracle of God’s Spirit. Christian boldness is a gift of God (Ephesians 6:19–20). Christian brokenheartedness is a gift of God (Psalm 51:10–17). And the counterintuitive combination of the two is one of God’s most beautiful works.
This is one of our aims and prayers, because we are Bible people. What the Bible presents as good and beautiful we pursue. But we have found over many years that our sinful hearts tend to distort the very beauties we pursue unless they are mingled with other beauties — especially the ones that lean against our most subtle distortions.
Beauty of Boldness
Boldness is a highly prized biblical beauty. Consider a few of the Bible’s presentations.
Bold in approaching God.
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace. (Hebrews 4:16; see also Ephesians 3:12)
Bold before mere man.
We can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:6)
Bold in righteousness.
The righteous are bold as a lion. (Proverbs 28:1)
Bold in new conquests.
Be strong and courageous, for you shall go with this people into the land that the Lord has sworn to their fathers to give them. (Deuteronomy 31:7–8; see also Joshua 1:9)
Bold before enemy kings.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or dismayed before the king of Assyria and all the horde that is with him. (2 Chronicles 32:7)
Bold before a new task.
David said to Solomon his son, “Be strong and courageous and do it. Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed . . . until all the work for . . . the house of the Lord is finished.” (1 Chronicles 28:20)
Bold for the sake of ministry.
I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish . . . the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus. (Acts 20:24)
Bold in speaking the truth.
Now, Lord, . . . grant to your servants to continue to speak your word with all boldness. (Acts 4:29; see also Ephesians 6:20)
Bold for the gospel.
Let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, . . . not frightened in anything by your opponents. (Philippians 1:27–28)
Bold to risk your life for the good.
I will go to the king, though it is against the law, and if I perish, I perish. (Esther 4:16)
Bold at the second coming.
Abide in [Christ], so that when he appears we may have confidence and not shrink from him in shame at his coming. (1 John 2:28)
Reasons for Boldness
Not only does the Bible present boldness as beautiful, but it gives even more beautiful reasons for being bold. Biblical boldness is not a genetic disposition. It is the work of God enabling unworthy sinners to be transformed by reasons the Bible gives us to be bold. The reasons are breathtaking. And it is no wonder that boldness is a fitting and beautiful response. Consider some of the reasons the Bible gives for us to be bold.
Our condemnation for sin was endured by Christ.
By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, [God] condemned sin in the flesh. (Romans 8:3; see also Isaiah 53:5)
Our sins are forgiven.
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses. (Ephesians 1:7; see also 1 Peter 2:24)
We are righteous in the righteousness of faith.
. . . not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith. (Philippians 3:9)
In Christ, we are the children of God.
See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. (1 John 3:1)
We have eternal life.
Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life. (John 3:36)
As God’s heirs, we possess everything.
All things are yours, whether . . . the world or life or death or the present or the future — all are yours, and you are Christ’s, and Christ is God’s. (1 Corinthians 3:21–23; see also Romans 8:32)
Everything will work for our good.
We know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)
We will never be put to shame.
It stands in Scripture: “Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone, a cornerstone chosen and precious, and whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.” (1 Peter 2:6)
God will never leave us nor forsake us.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10; see also Hebrews 13:5)
God will keep us from falling into unbelief.
[He] will sustain you to the end, guiltless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. (1 Corinthians 1:8–9)
God governs the fall of sparrows, and we are more precious than they.
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. (Matthew 10:29–31)
When hated and killed, we are not defeated.
Some of you they will put to death. You will be hated by all for my name’s sake. But not a hair of your head will perish. (Luke 21:16–18)
We are more than conquerors at the moment the worst happens to us.
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. (Romans 8:35–37)
If the devil kills us, God gives us a crown of life.
Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison. . . . Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life. (Revelation 2:10)
How can we not be bold if these are true! And they are true. If Christ is real, these glorious reasons to be bold are real. And nothing is more real than Christ. So, we find in ourselves a stirring of boldness. The more clearly we see these biblical beauties, and the more heartily we embrace them, the more boldness grows in our souls.
Beauty of Brokenheartedness
But one of the great sorrows of the Christian life is that our remaining sinfulness threatens to distort the beauty of every holy pursuit. What Paul calls “sin that dwells within me” (Romans 7:17) takes hold of a biblical beauty and distorts it — sometimes blatantly so that the distortion is obvious, and sometimes subtly so that the distortion is oh so defensible.
Boldness can become brash, harsh, severe, cruel, angry, impatient, contentious, belligerent, coarse, crude, snarky, snide, loud, garish, obnoxious — all in the name of Christian courage. Or more subtly, boldness in the cause of truth can become, even if less brash and severe, more all-consuming. It can become such a fixation that all other beautiful affections and dispositions are eaten away from within. The soul loses its ability of see and savor and celebrate the good in others and in the world.
We have found that God’s remedy for such distortions of biblical beauties is to provide other moral beauties which are meant to mingle with boldness and prevent it from being ruined by sin. One of the beauties of the Bible that leans against our blatant and subtle distortions of boldness is brokenheartedness. We have discovered that biblical brokenheartedness is beautifully designed by God to preserve biblical boldness in all its power but none of its distortions. Consider the basis and beauty of brokenheartedness in a few biblical presentations.
The Lord is near the brokenhearted.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. (Psalm 34:18)
A broken and contrite heart is a pleasing sacrifice to God.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. (Psalm 51:17)
God dwells with and revives the lowly and contrite.
Thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: “I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite.” (Isaiah 57:15)
God attends to those who tremble at his word.
This is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word. (Isaiah 66:2)
The humble, mourning, and meek are blessed.
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. (Matthew 5:3–5)
Those who despair of self are justified.
The tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, “God, be merciful to me, a sinner!” I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. (Luke 18:13–14)
The godly obedient confess unworthiness.
When you have done all that you were commanded, say, “We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.” (Luke 17:10)
The reverent rejoice with trembling.
Serve the Lord with fear, and rejoice with trembling. (Psalm 2:11)
We work out our salvation with trembling.
Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12–13)
God’s might and care make us glad and lowly.
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6–7)
Even what we know truly, we know partly.
Now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. (1 Corinthians 13:12)
We resist revenge, self-pity, and ultimatums.
When reviled, we bless; when persecuted, we endure; when slandered, we entreat. (1 Corinthians 4:12–13)
We share the burden of the entire groaning creation.
Not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. (Romans 8:23)
We live with the anguish of unsaved loved ones.
I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart . . . for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh. (Romans 9:2–3)
We never get beyond the burden of sinning and the need of confession in this life.
Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? (Romans 7:24)
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)
Such brokenheartedness — contrition, lowliness, humility, trembling, meekness, anguish — is fitting in a fallen, and only partially saved, world. Yes, even fitting for saints — who are not yet perfect (Philippians 3:12) but “are being saved” (2 Corinthians 2:15). The very fitness of it is its beauty.
If it were our purpose here to speak of bold brokenheartedness (which it isn’t), we could linger over God’s wisdom in the way that the beauty of boldness is designed conversely to protect the beauty of brokenheartedness from being distorted into fear, self-pity, passivity, joylessness, hopelessness, cowardice, self-absorption, and fruitlessness.
But the point here is that God intends for the beauty of brokenheartedness to mingle with the beauty of boldness so that a new reality emerges even more beautiful than the sum of both — a new reality called brokenhearted boldness. It is one of God’s most beautiful works. And it is one of the most needed in our day.
We hope that at Desiring God we will not fail in the call to be bold for the truth. Please pray for us. We aspire by the Spirit to joyfully endure the cost of speaking biblical truth boldly. Should we ever suffer in some small way, we would like it to be said of us what was said of the apostles: “They left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the name” (Acts 5:41).
But we know something of our own sinfulness and how quickly we can strike back in the name of boldness. Our prayer is that God would spare us from the distortion of the courage he made to be beautiful, by creating something even more beautiful: brokenhearted boldness.
www.desiringgod.org.
When leading through uncertainty, you must display your humanity. You have to be vulnerable, transparent, real. The people who are looking to you need to experience your empathy because they will trust you enough to be open to your influence, and to follow you into the unknown.
www.northpoint.org.
Another birthday in the books. I won’t tell you which one I just celebrated but I will give you three hints.
1 – I clearly remember being sent home from school on the day President John F. Kennedy was assassinated.
2 – I can tell you exactly where I was when Neil Armstrong first stepped on the moon.
3 – I took Home Economics, learned to type on a manual typewriter, and mastered shorthand during my high school years.
While my actual age may still be a question, anyone can easily deduce by these “hints” that I now fall into the season of life affectionately referred to as “senior.”
And as such, I sometimes (especially near birthday season) am guilty of viewing my aging in terms of loss. I mourn the fleeting time; bemoan the gray hair, wrinkles, skin spots, and extra weight; and long to hold on to what was.
Allowing myself to get caught up in culture’s view of aging, I lose sight of God’s truth.
That is not how I want to live out this gift of another season. Rather than setting my heart on things I do not have – the precious bygone memories, the physical frame of my youth, the things I remember as good – and allowing time to rob me blind.
I want to be a “senior” who embraces God’s design for aging.
In God’s Word I read, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth” (Colossians 3:2). The truth is, when I allow myself to be ruled by time and its perceived threats, I am guilty of setting my mind on things of the earth. My eyes are not where they are supposed to be – on Christ.
Conversely when I set my mind on things above, I am reminded of power-wielding truth. God is greater than time. His promises extend beyond all time’s limits, and through Christ, time’s curse has been overturned.
With my mind set on God, I also recall Jesus’ promise that He came so that I may have abundant life (John 10:10). It was never His intention that I spend my “senior” years in life-sapping fear, regret, or sadness. Jesus came to bring life, no matter my season!
Consider these eight remarkable benefits of aging. Each one bears witness to Jesus’ promise of abundant life in this season. They are worth celebrating, and they are ours for the claiming.
But godliness with contentment is great gain – 1 Timothy 6:6
We spend decades searching for contentment. However, in our busy years of raising a family, earning an income, tending relationships, and figuring how to navigate life, contentment often remains elusive.
One precious benefit of aging is an abiding contentment – contentment that comes from resting in and trusting in God’s sovereign plan.
After walking with Him through the challenges and successes of everyday life, in this season we can experience a contentment that comes from knowing Him experientially. We can also enjoy contentment in discovering what God has for us in this season.
We’re more comfortable in our own skins. We can be our selves. There’s less clutter in our lives, and we know what matters most.
Perhaps that is why we are so comfortable wearing that faded, threadbare, old sweatshirt or sweater day after day no matter what our kids say!
Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding – Proverbs 3:13 ESV
With age comes a plethora of life experiences. In fact, “seniors” are the one who have truly “been there; done that!”
All this experience helps us develop a broader map of points of view and a deeper reservoir of options for resolution and compromise. Our life-experience also aids in the development of increased social graces, heightened empathy, and better control over our emotions.
Our culture does not place a high value on the wisdom of age, but God places great value on it.
We have a well of wisdom, and it’s worth celebrating. It’s also worth sharing.
Don’t hide it. Don’t let it go to waste. God’s design is always best.
You have a lifetime of experience and opportunities that didn’t exist when your primary focus was your children or your career.
Find an opportunity and go share!
The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands. – Psalm 138:8
As we age, the joy of unshakable faith in God can be ours.
This benefit – Unshakable Faith – is one that must be developed. We don’t get to wake up one day and claim it simply because we’ve aged.
God uses all our experiences to grow us and shape us. Nothing is ever wasted. Even the hard and the very difficult are for our good and for the work He is preparing for us.
So, we watch. We:
And we learn – to relinquish control, to trust in His sovereign hand, to surrender to the God of the universe.
Then as we age, we look back. We see and we know. He was with us. He did it!
We enjoy Unshakable Faith.
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. – 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Generally, as we age, we experience a loss of physical strength. Changes take place. Our bodies deteriorate. Unable to do the things we used to do, and full of aches and pains, we are prone to grieve this earthly loss of a strong, healthy body.
Once again, we need to be reminded to turn our gaze to things above. Instead of focusing on our loss, this is a time for setting our minds on things above and celebrating the spiritual strength that can be ours.
God’s Word tells us in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 that our inner self is being strengthened day by day and that our strength comes through faith, faith in the Lord.
Now that is something to celebrate!
Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. – Psalm 73:25
Aging generally changes one’s perception of time.
Increasingly more aware of our nearness to the “finish line,” our outlook tends to shift. We have a keener sense of what is important and where our focus needs to be.
No longer feeling the need to rush through life, we savor. Seniors take fewer things for granted, are less likely to procrastinate, and seek out positive ways to spend their time. We embrace family and tighten up our circle of friends.
In this beautiful season of refined priorities, we can enjoy time with the Lord as we’ve never enjoyed it before. We are free to spend more time in His Word, in prayer, and in serving others.
Letting go of the trivial, we hold on to what is most important by living lives that are purposeful and full of intent.
This was according to the eternal purpose that he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord – Ephesians 3:11
In the younger seasons of life, we talk about eternity. We even sing about eternity. But if we are honest, we’d have to admit that it’s often difficult to think beyond the next feeding, load of laundry, or day of work.
One precious benefit of aging is that God “gifts” to us an eternal perspective. It is in this season that we are better able to think beyond this life. Our eyes are more open to God’s plan, His purpose, and His vision.
Surrounded by a culture that’s shouting at the top of its voice that it’s “me-time,” God tells us something different. He says that it’s time to get to know Him better (John 17:3) and to invest in future generations (Psalm 145:4).
Seniors enjoy getting to know God better through more time spent in Bible reading and prayer, by more freely exhibiting gratitude, and worshipping more deeply.
With a teachable spirit and sensitivity towards God’s purpose, they deny themselves a life of self-indulgence and ask, “Lord, what do you have for me in this season of life?”
Then looking around and making themselves available, they grab their assignment. Discipling, mentoring, ministering, teaching – they serve, model, and invest in future generations.
The beneficiaries of eternal perspective, seniors live for God’s glory and the advancement of His kingdom.
One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts. – Psalm 145:4
For many of us, this season of aging also brings with it the dreaded empty nest. With heads hung low and hearts aching, we wonder what in the world we will do when our children are gone. We seriously doubt being able to survive the loss.
But that’s simply not the way it is at all. One of the beautiful benefits to aging is that we get to experience life from different vantage points. Rather than spending our years in grief and sorrow, we get to enjoy new roles as consultant, mentor, and grandparent.
We don’t lose our children, but our relationship with them does change. No longer the caregiver, commander, and coach, we take on the role of consultant. Free from the responsibility of calling the plays, we now parent from a place of wisdom that was gained through a lifetime of experience.
And in this season, our reach can even go beyond our own children. Embracing the role of mentor, our involvement in the form of conversation, discipleship, and teaching can help to point members of the next generation to Christ. Our investment gives them the chance to have their own encounters with God and learn to lean into Him.
But let’s not stop there. It’s getting good! Absolutely one of the best benefits of aging, by far, is the new role of grandparent. Having grandchildren in our lives allows us to experience the joys of young children again without having to carry the heavy weight of daily responsibility.
Grandparenting offers us an opportunity to build deep, new relationships, share our knowledge and expertise, pass along family traditions, and help point our grandchildren to Jesus. It’s one of the best gigs around!
So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom. – Psalm 90:12
No, seniors are not granted a supply of extra hours to add onto each day, but retirement does help to free up some of the hours we already have. And one of the benefits of aging is that we have a deeper appreciation for that time and seek to use it well.
We have more time to spend with our loved ones, and we embrace that time with family and friends tightly. If we’re married, this season affords us more time to do things together and to draw even closer in our relationship.
In addition to enjoying more time with others, our senior years offer us time to get involved in things that were once no more than fantasy. We have greater opportunity to seek adventures, chase dreams, and pursue passions.
It’s a time to be creative and to appreciate the creativity of others. And if we’re not sure about our dreams or passions or creative bent, it’s a time for rediscovery.
The additional time also enables us to better participate in organizations we deem worthwhile and to give back through the act of volunteering.
And most importantly, this benefit means we have more time to spend with God. More time in prayer, Bible study, praise, thanksgiving, and worship. More time in His presence, beholding His glory, and becoming more like Christ.
And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.– 2 Corinthians 3:18
The choice is ours. We can choose to spend this season of aging mourning the fleeting time, bemoaning the changes to our physical frame, and trying to hold on to what used to be, or we can choose to celebrate the remarkable benefits of aging.
“Don’t regret growing older. It’s a privilege denied to many.” (author unknown)
“This article first appeared on Crosswalk.com, March 11, 2019.”
Covid has been like a mission trip for the analog church.
We thought we were going on a short-term trip to a place that felt foreign.
We got there, and had to immediately learn some new languages and methods.
Turns out, this is becoming more like a long-term mission assignment. And since arriving in this digital Babylon (credit to David Kinnaman), we have been reaching people we never thought possible. It has actually led us to a stronger, more relevant and durable way of doing ministry with analog tools, digital tools, and everything in between. As Nicky Gumbel recently summed it up on Carey’s podcast, “we have tasted something better.”
For many leaders, the conversation around technology in ministry is relatively new. And not always welcome. Consider three postures that a leader might take when facing the possibility of innovation in the local church:
Each leader has followers who take a similar posture, which usually enhances the confirmation bias of the leader. This makes it difficult to form a measured, objective opinion about how and whether to adopt the new method. All three postures can produce benefit or harm if taken to an extreme.
The debate about technology’s role in the church has ranged from wineskins and a torn curtain to pipe organs, radio, and streaming video. With each advance, church leaders have had to grapple not only with the new medium, but also with the implications on power, ministry, and trust.
In many ways, Christianity owes its global spread to the work of people powered by technology. In fact, a sense of curiosity among Spirit-led pioneers of the past led us to adopt innovative technology for the work of the church. The implications were often positive, though often not fully anticipated. Consider:
Leaders who recognize the possibility of the moment are the ones who can smartly make new technology a tactic in their ministry strategy.
Are we in an Awakening?
We are in a watershed moment for the Church. In a recent interview, James Emery White (pastor at Mecklenburg Community Church) shared this with me: “I think the pandemic may have just saved the church in many ways. It got us out of a Sunday/weekend-centric approach. It forced us online and into social media, it also made us open to change, being creative when we were not creative before, and open to innovation. It also got us back down to raw mission–what is our mission? You add all of that up, and it is dangerously close to an awakening.”
Here are 12 key trends that have emerged so far this year. I believe every leader needs to critically evaluate whether these are true in each local context, and if so… how to respond.
By most estimates, the average family attended church between 1.2 and 1.7 times each month in 2019. Reasons for this vary, but it really messed with attendance numbers. Do you have average weekly attendance of 500? That could really mean you are reaching as many as 750 or 1000 people, just not all on the same week. Sporadic attendance patterns also make engagement models tough.
So, we had a problem with regular attendance. Then Covid hit.
Our buildings shut down, so attendance crashed to zero right? Well in many cases, pastors actually watched digital engagement increase at the very moment that physical attendance became impossible.
Then we entered phases of the numbers dilemma:
1. Tuning in: Digital viewership soared (we think)
2. Church surfing: many people viewed sermons, devotionals, music, and content from more than one source
3. Re-opening surprise: as churches opened their doors again, only 35% of people came back
4. Habit change: it’s looking like many folks will permanently opt for a more digital (or at least hybrid) model for engaging with the church.
What does “attendance” even mean anymore? Counting people in a blended physical/digital environment is challenging.
Churches desperately need new ways to not just get an accurate number, but to know who they’re reaching. At Gloo we’ve been talking to a number of churches about this problem, and they’ve helped us develop some early solutions such as the new Insights+ suite of tools. It’s now possible for any pastor to know how many people are interacting with the church online, and to see the human side of the numbers. What are the demographics? How are the marriages and relationships? What are the deepest spiritual needs in the communities I serve?
Rather than counting attendance, churches should start counting engagements and outcomes in the people they serve.
Here’s something that shocked us at my church during the quarantine. We had the highest level of Zoom participation in our Boomer groups and older. And although these folks were all-too-glad to get back to face-to-face fellowship, they’ve now seen that technology can work, and can help them maintain connection with people.
More broadly, according to a new Barna study, millennials have actually been more likely to stop engaging with church during Covid, compared to Boomers and Elders.
Pastors should consider technology-based solutions for effective ministry for the whole church, not just for the younger generations. Your middle and older generations may actually thank you for it.
What has been one of the most stressful parts of quarantine? For parents, it’s trying to juggle daily responsibilities while keeping kids occupied.
What has been one of the biggest impediments to engaging with church, including watching the weekend streaming service? It’s the fact that kids don’t like it. And for those churches who have been doing virtual kids’ ministry, many have been trying to combine several grades together so they can all watch together. This can result in watered-down or too-young programming that the older kids will tune out.
Try thinking more strategically about engaging kids online, such as:
Leaders may never get a better opportunity to scrutinize every budget line. As you consider re-opening and adding back programs, ask:
“What does this enable us to do?”
“Does this help us accomplish our mission?”
“How can we measure the success of this program?”
“What should this program look like if we want to serve both our physical and digital communities?”
“Is our church the best one to create or own this program, or should we curate/partner with the work of another organization?”
Every dollar you free up from old, outdated programs is a dollar you can now invest in reaching people in ways that are culturally relevant, measurable, and effective.
This year has probably been the hardest leadership environment we’ve seen. Here are just some of the heavy, mind-crushing decisions that pastors have been asked to make:
At every turn, many leaders approached these decisions with a rigorous, careful process that included many voices and data. Yet some pastors resorted to an isolated, gut-feel decision making process that left them wondering (maybe deep down) if they were making the right call. This is exhausting.
Healthy leaders are a prerequisite to a healthy organization. Operating for an extended period has taught us that using data to make decisions is very freeing. You’ll never have 100% of the information to make any decision. But when you have more of the information you need:
The best tool of the Covid season, from my perspective, has been church-specific assessments. Asking your people for input on everything from face masks… to job loss and financial disruption…. to protesting racial injustice has helped thousands of churches know their people better so they could make more informed decisions.
Every church should be in the habit of checking in with people both physically and online; it’s one of the easiest ways to take burden off the shoulders of a pastor and let the Holy Spirit, wise counsel, and objective data guide the decision.
There’s no replacement for face-to-face. But does that mean digital is impersonal? Quite the opposite. Here’s what one pastor told me in April:
“I was a critic of digital ministry until we were forced to switch. I’m completely converted. The quality and depth of the conversations I’m having with people online is incredible. Never have I been able go so personal, so quickly as I am right now. People are willing to share very personal things with me that they would never talk about in our building.”
Not only can personal interactions be surprisingly intimate online, but it’s also now possible to know more than ever before about your community, and your engaged audiences (whether online or physically present). Churches are using macro-level information to learn things such as:
These questions and many more can be answered, and can lead to incredible ministry opportunities. Churches can attract, get, keep, grow and multiply people more effectively now than in any prior time period. It’s easy to implement these capabilities using brand new offerings from Gloo.
You don’t need a big budget to leverage digital tools. In fact, congregations from the inner city to the suburbs are finding creative ways to reach more people than ever before. What’s working? It’s not slick production, fancy lights or multi-camera setups. Those are nice-to-haves.
What reaches people is authenticity.
A pastor recording a 3-minute honest comment on a smartphone can touch people in places where a 30-minute sermon cannot.
Further, digital pathways provide the means for any congregation to reach any individual–crossing the lines of ethnicity, community and social station. Pastor Samuel Rodriguez told me, “The digital platform is multi-ethnic. It’s not like there are groups left behind. It’s multi-ethnic, multi-generational, and it becomes our primary faucet for disseminating the Gospel.”
Is small group still small group when it’s over video? Does virtual prayer still count? Can a person grow spiritually in a community that interacts through screens?
Hang in there, I’m not saying that Matthew 18:20 is irrelevant. But what if “where two or three are gathered” could extend to new definitions of “gathered?” Could God still move through pixels?
Things you can only do in person:
Things you can only do online:
Things can actually be better with a blend of analog and digital together:
Thinking about the 5 core areas of human flourishing, our world is disrupted in all of them.
Research on Google Trends reveals that each of these topics has experienced spikes in traffic since March 2020 (health and money are the leaders). If your church is preaching scripture, then you have something to offer your community in all of these areas! The question is, will you be able to reach these people in new ways?
Reaching people through an area of their lives with acute need (see the list above) can lead to gospel conversations, spiritual formation, and deeper discipleship opportunities. This applies in person, and it applies online. This is your moment to think about how to be a more externally-focused church.
Is the world hurting right now? You bet. Is your community in need of gospel-centered love, restoration, teaching and truth? Absolutely. Are they finding it in church buildings? Not so much.
The gospel message is not tied to any one delivery mechanism, and regardless of medium, it never returns void (Isaiah 55:11). As many are hearing the groans of a broken world in need of a savior, the gospel message is more needed now than ever. And people are responding online!
Terry Storch, Digerati Pastor at Life.Church, shared a breathtaking statistic with me after our first all-digital Easter. Across the thousands of churches that interact with the Church Online Platform that his team manages, they saw 75,000 people indicate a first-time decision (online) to accept Jesus Christ as savior on Easter alone. Praise God for the technology to reach people who need to hear the Good News.
We must hold each other accountable to evangelize. Not later, but right now. By any means available to us.
If your church is solely using its online presence as a content delivery channel for existing members, you are missing the bigger opportunity to reach people and help them grow. Whether it’s neighborhood evangelism, Google ad campaigns, or any form of social media outreach, there are countless creative ways that you and your congregation can reach people right now.
There are rich and effective tools available to draw each person forward on their spiritual journey. One of our core tenets at Gloo acknowledges that relationships catalyze growth. Intimate, life-on-life discipleship often involves in-person connections (as it should), but we can leverage additional tools in the process. Not just as an alternative, but to enrich the personal connection!
Have you ever used a personal trainer or a nutritional coach? These relationships work because they involve a few key steps:
Set a baseline of my current state or situation
Agree on a goal
Recommend steps for me to take
Monitor my progress
Encourage and hold me accountable me along the way
Measure at regular intervals until I reach my goal
Celebrate and set the next goal
Using a trainer/coach helps me reach my goal because I am combining a relationship with the right steps, and we can measure the result. Your discipling process might look slightly different, but should mirror this sequence for the most part.
Effective discipleship ministries are leveraging tools to equip their people to disciple each other effectively. These might include:
The church has adopted new tools before, with significant consequences. Consider things we take for granted now such as printed Bibles, musical instruments, buildings with climate control, websites, online giving, and live streaming.
Every leader has a choice on whether to keep pushing forward. Sometimes that means doing the same thing for a while. Sometimes that means trying new things.
I get it.
We’re tired of disruption. Tired of pivots. Tired of hearing about the “new normal”. But a big reason we’re tired is because we’re in uncharted territory, and it’s hard to keep guessing at what’s coming next.
Change involves curiosity. Sacrifice. And often, getting outside your comfort zone.
Don’t wait for the world to throw your church another curve ball. You can be more prepared for what’s next, if you continually seek ways to reach people no matter the landscape. The future of the local church will be shaped by how we handle the digital opportunity now.
I’ll close with a reminder of Douglas Adams’ quote from The Salmon of Doubt:
“1. Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works.
2. Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty-five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it.
3. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.”
This post was written by Brad Hill. Brad is a senior executive leader at Gloo, a technology company built on a passion for personal growth and transforming lives. By connecting an innovative suite of products and resources for church leaders, Gloo supports a trusted platform that helps church leaders know and move every person they serve.
You can learn more at gloo.us.
As people connect with your church online, you’ve lost visibility into who is engaging with your church.
Insights+, a new service being offered by my partners at Gloo, removes the confusion.
They use online data to bridge the digital gap between you and your people.
With this new platform, you can:
In a world of confusing and vague YouTube and Google Analytics dashboards, Insights+ gives you the ability to clearly see your people again.
www.CareyNieuwhof.com.
They say that comparison is the thief of joy, and whoever “they” are, I agree with them.
If we are always measuring ourselves against our neighbors who are broadcasting their latest and greatest on Instagram or Facebook, how are we to be content with our own lives?
Everyone struggles with comparison, but I believe that perhaps the struggle is compounded for women. As women, we tend to be more emotional by nature, and it’s easy to let comparisons—however minor they may be—turn into shame. And friends, if comparison is the thief of joy, shame is the prison that locks it away.
Comparison is an extremely destructive thing. It leads to self-depreciation, self-rejection, and depression. When we believe the lies of comparison, that’s where shame steps in—the fear of being unworthy. Shame makes us feel small, unwanted, and unloved. And together, comparison and shame will keep us from living the full, happy lives we’re destined to live.
I don’t know about you, but I want to live a life full of joy. A life free of comparison and shame. But in order to live that life, I have to consciously fight back against the comparison trap each and every day.
Here are three ways I’ve learned to fight back against comparison:
1. Begin the day on a positive note.
The way I begin my day typically sets the tone for how I operate the rest of the day. Am I frazzled and stressed? Or am I grounded and at peace? For me, starting my day reading the Bible and in prayer—not work email or skimming social media—prepares my mind and my heart to combat comparison.
2. Value your uniqueness.
The tendency that most of us face is to devalue our own uniqueness, and instead attempt to become a carbon copy of those we admire. Instead of thinking “I wish I was more ____ “ or “If only I could ____ “, remind yourself about what makes you, you. What makes you unique. There’s only one you on this planet, only one person who can do every single thing you do—and that’s the way it’s supposed to be! When you catch yourself in the comparison trap, remind yourself of your strengths, talents, gifts, and abilities.
3. Limit the time spent on social media.
While social media certainly isn’t the cause of the comparison trap, it does seem to make us more susceptible to the trap! Social media is not real life, but rather a highlight reel that can make our minds run wild with comparisons. I suggest limiting the amount of time you spend online and instead filling your life with the good stuff—people and relationships.
The truth is, this is your one and only life and you should never squander it in the world of comparison. It is great to be stirred and inspired by one another, but not to compete and compare with each other. Let’s cheer each other on to live our best lives, valuing our uniqueness and differences.
www.propelwomen.org.
Are there times when you feel a strong pull to say or do something to fit in or to be liked or to control someone’s perception of you? At some level we all experience this temptation–goodness sakes–we’re human. But, it’s not ok to be ok with this. In other words, sort of giving up the struggle on battling against doing things, saying things, or trying to control our perception of others is a white flag you can’t afford to raise.
Why?
How do I begin to break free of the temptation to fit in?
Nothing to lose and everything to gain…
This is one beautiful facet of the gospel (good news that God has made a way to be in fellowship with Him through Christ where there previously was no way). The gospel explains to the Christian that they were loved, cherished, and chosen not on the basis of their built-in goodness or righteousness, but because God made a way to them where there was no way. He provided the means to a sick, sour, and sordid person (you and me) in the midst of our sin, so that we would see everything as a gift from Him. In other words, because God loved us and brought us to a relationship with Him, as new children of His we then become stewards of everything (including relationships with people, our families, our money, etc.).
I like to think of it as a little child adopted into a loving family, and for the first time they realize the love, care, and charity they received from their new parents. They hear of the previous plight that they were rescued from, and they shudder to think of the lifestyle and despicable condition they would have been forced to live in. It’s at this point that they realize that everything they have from these new parents is given to them not because they were a perfect kid, but because their new parents chose them and bestowed a new life to them. They have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
The Christian’s story is very similar to this one above. In the depths and sorrows of our sin God rescued us brought us forth. Incredible! We were saved from a life of sin, and given a new life in Christ. Thus, as the Christian remembers this new life in Christ, and that they nothing to lose in life, but everything to gain, they are able to see relationships for what they are…a means to love as they were loved, a means to express forgiveness as they were forgiven, a means to express acceptance as they received acceptance, and a means to be committed as God through Christ is committed to them.
Therefore, the margin left to fitting in is gone. There’s just no room for it to survive as the Christian remembers his new life in Christ, and forgets the old life as a sinner.
Are you meditating on this reality? That in Christ you have everything, and thus you have nothing on this earth to lose (be it reputation, misunderstandings, misperceptions, etc), but everything to gain. In Christ, you are God’s son or daughter, you are loved, you are accepted–forever and always. That’s enough to alleviate any human’s unacceptance of you.
May we remember this…we’re accepted in Christ by our faith in His finished work on our behalf, and we can now walk as God’s unique creation and not as the constant chameleon!
Glory!
So, in light of everything that’s changed and been disrupted so far in 2020, what future church trends should you be watching as a leader?
I usually do a church trends post every January, but with the almost surreal events of 2020 unfolding as they have, it’s time to rethink what’s ahead again. Hence, a fresh post outlining 7 trends to watch.
Crisis, after all, is not just a disruptor, it’s an accelerator.
Some of the changes that were likely arriving in 5-10 years (like the normalization of remote work) arrived in days.
The shift from facility-centered ministry to home-based ministry happened in hours.
And while there will be a return to some version of normal, normal as we knew is likely gone, at least for a while. It’s hard to go back to normal when normal disappeared.
And because the future is unkind to the unprepared, the best thing a leader can do is prepare.
Disruption is hard because disruption is inconvenient. It’s far easier to keep doing what you’re doing, hoping for better results, or going back to normal as quickly as possible to regain what you’ve lost.
The good news is that leaders who embrace change, who find the energy, passion and time to keep pivoting, will likely end up advancing their mission in the future.
So what are the new 2020 church trends you should watch in what is shaping up to be a very pivotal year?
Here are 7.
Let me just say I hope I’m wrong on some of them, but I’m including them because I think they’re happening.
As I’ve had to remind myself as a leader and Christ-follower for decades, just because you don’t like something doesn’t mean it isn’t true.
I don’t like all these trends either, but that doesn’t mean they’re not happening.
The best question to ask in a time of disruption is, “What does this make possible?”
There’s a lot that’s possible for the future church.
This is a tough trend to handle, so let’s just start here.
Despite a reported initial surge in online attendance and subsequent slump, new polling by the Barna Group shows a rather surprising reality.
48% of churchgoers say they have not watched any church online in the last 4 weeks.
Let that sink in for a minute.
Almost half of all churchgoers haven’t done any online or in-person church in a month.
Double clicking on that information yields another insight.
Only 40% of churchgoers report watching their regular home church online. A rather surprising 23% said they streamed a different church (either in place of their regular church or in addition to their regular church).
What does this mean?
Well, as hard it is to hear, the data suggests that even regular attenders are either not connecting with their church right now or starting to experiment with different options.
Don’t be quick to blame online church.
Crisis is an accelerator, and for decades the trend has been for even committed Christians to attend less often. The chaos and dislocation of the crisis may simply be amplifying that long-standing trend.
Stay with me though for a minute more.
We also know that as of late May 2020, 29% of churches are still reporting an attendance jump over previous levels.
So…the fact that 29% of churches are seeing an attendance spike and 23% of Christians say they are watching a church other than their home church might mean further consolidation is happening.
What exactly does ‘consolidation’ mean?
It means the churches that are growing and picking up people from churches that aren’t growing.
This has been happening for decades with the disappearance and decline of small and mid-sized churches and the growth of large churches and mega-churches. And while growing churches are definitely reaching unchurched people, they have also been picking up Christians from other churches.
That trend might well be accelerating during the disruption.
Consolidation of the book market happened in the 1990s as independent bookstores went out of business as major chains like Barnes and Noble, Borders and even Walmart, Costco and Target took chunks out of their market share. Then, of course, Amazon emerged and took a chunk out of all the big box stores.
Similarly, General Motors consolidated after the Great Recession as it got rid of Pontiac, Saturn, Saab and Hummer to focus on fewer products.
In the future, the Church will prevail, but not every church will prevail. The crisis may be accelerating a trend that’s already happening.
So where’s the hope in this?
First, smaller and mid-sized churches will have to find their niche.
As I wrote about in my original church trends post for 2020, the middle is disappearing from culture as it is, so being focused on your community and the people you love and want to reach is a great place to start.
As large churches become larger, no one should be able to out-local the local church. I have more ideas on that in Trend 5 here.
Second, digital isn’t only the purview of large churches. You don’t have to have a big budget to have a big impact online.
Everyone you want to reach in your region is online. When you behave like that’s true, you stand a much better chance of reaching them.
In the future, the Church will prevail, but not every church will prevail. The crisis may be accelerating a trend that already happening.CLICK TO TWEET
As tempting as it will be to reopen the doors and believe everyone is coming back, the data (right now) shows that’s probably not the case.
To begin, social distancing makes full rooms impossible and, until it’s safe to do mass gatherings, unwise.
Full rooms are months away, if not longer.
Second, a recent related poll of thousands of church leaders facilitated by Gloo, showed people have little consensus around when they feel ‘safe’ to gather again in public.
Asked which other type of activity BEST signals to you that it is time to open in-person worship at the church, the most common answer was a low community level of COVID cases (21.5%).
Other responses included when:
But the following results also speak volumes:
Essentially, 25% either aren’t sure or aren’t coming back for a long time.
An additional 30% of respondents said they’d rather worship at home and only return when they can be mask-free at church.
Combine that with trend #1 (48% aren’t doing anything right now and 23% are connecting with other churches), and the picture is very different than most leaders would hope for.
I know, that’s not encouraging, but it’s both real and understandable.
So what do you do?
First, you can poll your congregations on these exact questions (for free) and add a few questions of your own, by creating your own (free) Return to Church Checkin here. Then you won’t have to guess.
Second, prepare yourself for the emotional let down of a staggered and less than optimal return. I know what it feels like to be hoping for a full room in normal conditions and seeing empty seats.
That may be the reality for a while to come. My guess is a lot of leaders are struggling with the lack of ‘normal’ more deeply than they realize.
Get counselling, talk to a friend, pray and prepare yourself for a longer period of disruption that you want. That’s what leadership requires sometimes.
Finally, focus on your mission and rethink your methods.
You’re not ‘locked’ into what you’re doing now.
Innovate. Experiment.
Make your mission more important than your methods.
Crisis may be an accelerator, but it’s also the cradle for innovations and breakthroughs.
I never win popularity contests when I write about this, but I’m going to keep going. It’s just too important to ignore.
Growing churches in the future will become digital organizations with physical expressions, not physical organizations with a digital presence.
The difference in this trend is as stark as JC Penny and Amazon.
JC Penny (which recently filed for Chapter 11), like Sears and ToysRUs, were physical retailers that slowly adapted an online presence, behaving like most people still wanted an in-person experience.
Amazon, of course, started as a digital retailer that gradually moved into physical stores.
What’s surprising is that sometimes the digital connections have been as or more meaningful than the in-person connections.
I realize there will be many who push back against this, but it’s foolish to ignore the fact that people connect more easily online and often admit the truth more readily online than they do in-person (that might not be right, but, as this Stanford research shows, it is often true).
To put digital church back on the shelf in the new normal is to ignore the greatest opportunity the church today has to reach people.
Seeing digital as optional really does mean your church will end up like malls in the age of Amazon, just hoping for people to show up again.
And it also ignores the fact that many will want digital to be at least an option, if not a preferred method of engagement where geography and other barriers prevent access.
Forget the fact that for the moment, everyone is Zoomed out and longing for human connection, and think about the past and the future.
Digital isn’t going away. It will continue to grow and advance.
Further, digital scales in a way that analog doesn’t.
Online church transcends geographic, physical and time barriers in a way that analog doesn’t.
Will we still have in-person, physical gatherings and services? Absolutely. But in the future church, if you care about people, you’ll care about digital church.
I realize trends like these can feel exhausting.
Of all the qualities leaders will need in the future, agility is near the top of the list.
The fact that you are still leading months into the pandemic is evidence you have this quality, which is amazing. But like a muscle, you have to hone and develop it.
If there’s one prediction about the future that seems to be accurate, it’s that the dislocation and uncertainty we’re seeing now will continue. The new normal, whatever that is, is aways off.
In an uncertain climate, flexibility is ability and agility is a super power.
Agility will matter more in the future because the ‘innovation’ that happened in the first few months of lockdown wasn’t really innovation. It was adaptation.
Quick pivots, regular experimentation and the ability to respond to a rapidly changing culture will be critical.
While your mission will never change, your methods will have to.
To help with that, I’ve put together a team training on agility called The 30 Day Pivot. It’s the exact framework I’ve used to pivot regularly in my leadership (especially since the crisis) and it will help you leverage change quickly to help you advance your mission amidst all the change happening.
You can learn more here.
Agility is a key quality for future leaders, because, as they say, if you don’t like change, you’ll like irrelevance even less.
In the same way church went digital overnight, staff teams for churches and corporations did too.
I talked to a number of CEOs over the last week (who tend to be far more bottom-line driven than church leaders) who said as hard as the adjustment was for their teams to become virtual overnight, they’re not going back to the way it was before.
Some may close their offices and become entirely remote. Others will simply scale back things like square footage and travel along with the instance that everyone come in every day.
Twitter and Facebook both recently announced that employees can work from home indefinitely regardless of when the lockdown or social distancing ends.
Gallup has discovered many workers have a growing appetite for working from home as much as possible.
It’s the beginning of a new era for work.
Translate that for church leaders.
As inefficient as working from home might seem now (kids hanging off you, everyone signing into Slack for the first time and not quite sure how Asana works), one day the kids will be back in school and novel tools will be normal tools, and then the real efficiency of flexible and remote work will start to kick in.
Prior to the disruption, there was already an emerging trend that saw your most talented young employees asking for the most flexibility: To work from home, coffee shops or to flex their hours. That will only accelerate.
The future workplace for churches and businesses will be flexible workplaces: With an array of in-person and remote teams.
Again, move ahead five months, and begin to think about hiring the ideal Exec Pastor you’ve been wanting to hire for a long time who doesn’t want to move. Bringing him or her on board as staff and flying them in a few times a year suddenly looks far more feasible than it did even a month ago. And with Zoom and video calls normalized now, you won’t feel nearly as distant as you would have earlier in having team members join meetings remotely.
On future teams, insisting that everyone show up in person will become a competitive disadvantage.
8-4 stopped working years ago. Now it’s broken beyond repair. The future workplace is the flexible workplace.
One of the most exciting trends to emerge so far is to see churches focus on everyday ministry, not just Sunday ministry.
With a slow return to church and the shift to digital church as the default, many church leaders will realize their focus in ministry will have to shift from their facilities to people’s homes.
In many ways, this is a solid theological move, as well.
To have people assume responsibility for their own spiritual growth, for evangelism, discipleship and even leadership of their own families can only be a good thing.
An unspoken assumption of the old model of church was that to ‘grow,’ you had to come to a facility and participate in a program or service.
In the future, church leaders will see themselves more as equippers, helping people bring their faith more deeply into the homes, neighborhoods and workplaces.
In some strange way, this is what many church leaders have longed to see but not really seen, and in part it might be because the focus has been on getting people to come to a building to grow, not on equipping them where they are. Mark Sayers has a lot of thoughtful things to say about this trend on his Rebuilders Podcast.
Think of it as an application of something you’ve been trying to do for years through social media, online live events and even email marketing: Those forums have allowed you to show up in people’s lives every day, not just on Sundays.
When it comes to discipleship and evangelism, every day is more important than Sunday.
That trend will only accelerate in the future.
If people live every day in need of hope and resources to live out their faith (or to find faith) every day, church leaders have to start coming alongside people every day.
In the future, churches will shift their focus from Sunday to every day, because people need to find faith and live out their faith every day.
In many ways, this trend has already happened. It’s just few people are talking about it.
In the 80s and 90s, TV shifted from live-viewing (you had to watch your fave show Thursday night at 9 or you missed it), to on-demand viewing, at first through VCRs, then TiVo and finally, through streaming services like Netflix, Hulu and Disney+.
We’ve been an on-demand culture for a while.
Except, most churches don’t behave that way. We push everything toward a live event, assuming that most people who access an experience will do so exactly when it happens.
As Mike Todd of Transformation Church—which is reaching hundreds of thousands of people online each month—says, the live experience represents a fraction of their total audience.
So what should you do?
Well, you probably have an archive.
Some of you have an audio archive of MP3 messages. Some of you have a podcast. Others have years of YouTube videos or services captured in HD that sit on some website nobody visits.
Leverage those.
Just because your content isn’t brand new doesn’t mean it won’t be new to your audience. Especially a new audience. (And don’t flatter yourself…most of your church has no idea what you said last year, or last month. Neither does mine.)
Here’s what’s true: You may have done your last family series two years ago, but I promise you families haven’t stopped having issues in the last 24 months (quarantine might make that series way more relevant).
Your last money series may be exactly what someone needs to hear right now.
That message you did on hope from the Psalms is exactly what someone feeling at the bottom needs right now.
The amazing thing about email, social media and other online channels you have is you can repurpose and reuse content to meet people where they’re at and reach new people who have never met you.
Not sure how to run campaigns like that of have a budget to hire staff to do it?
Great older content works. If you’re having trouble communicating with your kids, do you care that Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages was written in the 90s? Nope. You don’t. You read it. It changes things.
The key is to share these on weekdays and on other channels throughout the week while you’re still directing people to what’s next and new on the weekend.
People don’t care if a message is new nearly as much as they care if a message is great.
Don’t believe this? How many times have you rewatched The Office or Friends?
www.careynieuwhof.com.
We need to live lives that demand an explanation. Paul lived this life that didn’t make any sense. In Philippians 4, he is talking about joy and contentment while chained to a prison guard in jail. If you could write a letter to your loved ones in prison, would you write about happiness or complain? In Philippians 4:13 we have the most misquoted verse in the Bible. Evander Holyfield had it on his robe “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me…” and I am going to pulverize my opponent. He wore the same robe to fight another rival, and he bit the dust. Maybe you use this verse as a promise to ace a test in class when you didn’t study. “I can do all things through Christ.” We need to look at the context of the verse.
This is what Philippians 4:10-12 says:
“I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”
Have you learned Paul’s secret? “No matter what the economy does, I don’t care.” How many people have you met that have that attitude? They are suffering and others say to them, “You should be stressed out, you should panic.” In contrast, Paul says “be content.”
Christ is enough. You can have nothing and can be content. You can be rich and be content. I really encourage you to read the Bible with an open mind. Voltaire once said, “God created man in his own image and now man is returning the favor.” We want to recreate God in the way we want to be. I want a God okay with me sleeping with my girlfriend, I want a God who says, “my body, my choice.” One author wrote, “The American church has created a middle-class Jesus.” For example, they say that it’s okay to make your nuclear family an idol. When it comes to you and your kids, take care of them first even before your relationship with Jesus. You never find that in the Bible. Christ taught us to be willing to hate father, mother, wife, kids. He said my true brothers, sisters and mother obey my words. I’m not saying we shouldn’t love our family. It’s just that following Jesus comes first. We need a radical Jesus, the Christ of the Bible. We must not settle for a middle-class Jesus.
Sometimes the words of Christ seem crazy. Like, “Quit storing things up on earth. See the birds of the air. God provides for them, He will provide for you.” If you want to find a radical Jesus, read through one of the Gospels.
Life is a lot shorter than you realize. I don’t believe I’m crazy enough about Christ. All of Jesus is enough. Anything we give to the Lord is totally worth it. Don’t let your desires color your perspective. There are things about Jesus I don’t like. I prefer He didn’t say those things. When I read what Jesus says, I’m going to try to tweak me, to conform to Jesus, even when it’s hard to do. As I’ve followed, I have found I understand why He said it. When He said it, I know He’s right. Even things on which you disagree, I would encourage you to ask the question, “What have you made Jesus to be?” You will find that a middle-class Jesus never existed. Jesus said, don’t worry about the future, God will provide.” You can know contentment today by surrendering to Jesus and His Word.
What do you need to surrender to Him today? Keep an open heart as God speaks to you.
If you were to list your top three most creative people, who would be on that list? Maybe Vincent van Gogh? Walt Disney? JK Rowling? Thomas Edison? Leonardo DaVinci? Marie Curie?
What would the world be without creatives in our midst? Creativity takes the mundane and makes it special. Creativity solves seemingly intractable problems. Creativity causes smiles, surprise, and thinking.
There was a time that Christians were those on the cutting edge of creativity. Take a look at a medieval cathedral and you can’t help but be impressed. Dig a little deeper at the imbedded symbolism and mathematic artistry in its design and your jaw will drop.
Today’s church doesn’t have a great reputation for its creativity. That is partially its fault (the offerings of Christian movie makers and mainstream visual artists, for instance, have been, for the most part, weak in their creative merits). This is not as it should be. Christians’ thinking ought to be characterized not by its safety, nor by its sentimentality, nor by its predictability.
Whoever tops your list of the most creative people in history is dramatically eclipsed by God. In the beginning, the source of all creativity was. And there was nothing else. And then, with a word, God formed electrons and stars and Loriciferans (look them up!) and Venus Flytraps and Baobab trees and Filbert Weevils and platypuses, and sunsets.
Undoubtedly, part of the way in which we image our creator is in our creativity. While God creates ex nihilo, we create from God’s creation and within the parameters of his order. And it delights him when we do so.
The church is often at her best in crisis. And I believe that the church has been at her creative best in the midst of this COVID-19 outbreak. On a micro level, I’ve sat back and marveled at how the creativity that has spilled out of our team. I honestly can’t keep up with the ways our team has pivoted on a dime and spun out great ideas, from do-it-at-home Easter activity packages, to zoom games to launching a Free Little Pantry, to our Sunday School teachers reading stories to their kids, to virtual communion, to breakout zoom face-to-face meetings where we can make personal connections with online worshipers, to interactive student ministry contests with pizza delivered as a prize.
I’ve had the opportunity to be on dozens of zoom calls and webinars with other church leaders over the past couple of months. The creative ideas the church is coming up with make me smile. Some churches are doing their entire worship service via zoom, others have done worship and prayer services from their cars in hospital parking lots, Christian business owners are pivoting their businesses to meet medical equipment needs, others are hosting Easter parades in cars, others are hosting drive-in or drive-through church.
I pray that this is the beginning of a new creative era of the church. Let’s reflect who God has made us to be: those whose creativity reflects our marvelous Creator.
Where have you seen creativity since the COVID-19 pandemic started?
www.thebeehive.live. Used by permission of the author.
Why is church attendance declining? Why are churches failing? Carey Nieuwhof reveals the hearts of many Christians today. He writes:
First, spirituality is increasingly seen an individual pursuit, not a community activity.
Honestly, I get it. In a world that has gotten noiser, louder and angrier, there’s a part of me that wants to retreat into myself more every day.
Add to that the brokenness of true human community and unhealthy (or toxic) cultures, and it’s so much easier to say “I’m just going to figure this out on my own.” Which many people are trying to do.
I feel the pull too.
But I have to remind myself that for the most part, my desire to skip, pull away and do my own thing on my schedule isn’t solitude, it’s isolation. And while solitude is a gift from God, isolation is a tool of the enemy.
And there’s no faster way to render a community ineffective than to isolate its members.
Second, because of how withdrawn and individualistic we’re all becoming, I wonder if—in an age in which people are devoted mostly to themselves—the mere act of attending church is becoming a spiritual discipline.
Devoting yourselves publicly to God and to a wider community is a countercultural act.
Finally, there’s a paradox developing that I don’t hear many people talking about publicly, and that’s spiritual growth.
In my observation, rarely does decreased church attendance produce increased devotion.
Sure, there are popular bloggers, authors and podcasters who might claim it does, but get out onto the streets and have a conversation with many people who used to go to church that don’t anymore, and you’ll meet a lot of people whose faith hasn’t grown.
If anything, it’s diminished.
So where does this leave us?
In an age where everyone is looking for alternatives to gathering together, here are 10 things that—helpful as they may be in some respect—aren’t church.
If it gets a bit feisty in the points below, just know it’s because I’m challenging the gravitational pull I feel sometimes in me and I see all the time around me.
So here goes. Here are 10 things that still ain’t church.
Watching church online has exploded in the last decade.
We have an online campus at our church, which I love, because for many people it’s a step into church can be if it’s a step back in if you’re out of town or on vacation, but for too many people people church online is a step out of church.
It’s a step toward lower devotion, not greater devotion. And to less mission, not deeper mission.
Here’s a little exercise I want to propose. If you’re watching online because it’s easier (or honestly, you’re just lazy), get yourself into a real human community.
Yes, a real church is going to be worse than your online experience. You will have to sit next to people you don’t like and who aren’t like you.
You could get hurt. You’ll have to do something. And you may have to give.
You’ll get into awkward conversations with people as you invite them to come with you. And you may damage the friendship as a result and feel all worried.
This is church. (Have you ever read 1 Corinthians? I mean really….)
Dating is easier than marriage. Especially first dating. But marriage is where the real reward is after you’ve disliked each other long enough to fall in love again and remember that in the midst of the mess God is writing a deeper, more powerful story than you could ever write on your own.
A C+ real life church experience is better than an A+ online church experience because real life is messy, and it’s going to force you grow.
If you want to 1.5x speed God into your life while you’re on a run or driving to work, go ahead.
I love podcasting, but in the end, what it gives you is information and not much more.
Podcasting (and church online) should function like online dating. Everyone I know who met online and fell in love gets married. You rarely meet someone who says “We met online, have been married for five years but we’ve never actually met.” Of course you meet, that’s the point.
And I think that’s the point of church podcasts and church online…they lead to something greater: real human interaction around a mission bigger than you.
But 1.5xing a sermon podcast every week probably only gives you a .5 dose of God.
Because there are thousands of churches online and thousands more who put their content online via podcasts, many people have multiple preachers they listen to and think of as their ‘pastors’.
It’s great that you’re listening, or that you follow 10 megachurch pastors or local pastors on Instagram, but that’s not church.
You may have a charcuterie board of favourite speakers and feel full, but true discipleship is not measured by how much you know, it’s measured by how much you love, and how much that love flows out of you and into the lives of others.
We live in an amazing time where it’s easy to start almost anything you imagine, including a charity.
Charities are amazing, but they’re not church.
When the church gathers in worship, prayer, community, joins together on a mission to baptize people and grow people into the likeness of Christ…well that’s church.
I have a company outside the church that helps produce this blog, my podcast, books etc. Guess what? I think of it as a ministry, and it has huge ministry implications, but it’s not the church.
It never will be. Sure, we think of it in many ways as a ministry. And yes, we’re on mission to help leaders. But it ain’t church.
If you stop attending a local church, it’s easy to come up with substitutes for it, like having coffee (or meals, or whatever) with friends.
The early church didn’t change the world by gathering with friends for coffee.
By all means, be social. Hang out. Cultivate deep friendships. Hang out. Connect. But don’t fool yourself—that isn’t church either.
I understand that this one will be a little controversial, but most of the time, that gathering in your house ain’t church either.
Even if you gather to pray, study scripture, fellowship and celebrate communion, it may still not be the church. Why?
Too often house church functions as a community of people who are fleeing the church, who have been hurt by the church, or who are rejecting the local churches in their neighbourhood.
Rarely (I mean rarely, it’s not like it never happens) do I see a house church really embrace the full mission of the church, which would include evangelism baptizing new disciples, community service, giving financially beyond itself and an outward focus that brings more people into the Kingdom.
If that happens—and occasionally it does—then that is church. The problem of course, is that when you embrace all of that, it won’t be long until you outgrow your living room…and you start gathering in public space because you can’t squeeze into a home anymore.
But if it’s just the eight of you year after year after year after year…it probably ain’t church.
I love nature. My wife really loves nature.
Almost all of us feel closer to God in nature. And some personality types feel extremely close to God in nature—maybe even closer than they feel in church.
But your subjective feeling is no substitute for a timeless mission. God didn’t just call us to feel him. He calls us to serve him.
I love my family. You love yours. And family devotions are wonderful.
When you’re on vacation, I get that you may do family devotions on a Sunday rather than a long drive into a local church.
But a steady diet of family devotions—even daily devotions—isn’t church because your family isn’t baptizing people, reaching out into the community, serving, or even moving beyond itself to engage the world for which Christ died.
Authentic mission has to go beyond you to someone else and embrace and include them.
Family devotions may be sincere and convenient, but they’re no substitute for the Kingdom of God.
Church shopping is one thing. But I’ve met a growing number of people who are doing what I can only call church surfing.
They may go to the 9 a.m. service at one church, and then sample the later service at another, and then they switch it up against next weekend, adding maybe a third church into the mix.
It’s like serial dating with no engagement, commitment or even investment.
Once again, it’s an expression of a consumer culture—take, but feel no obligation to give.
Of course, a significant life is rarely measured by what you consume. It’s measured by what you contribute.
Church surfing contributes almost nothing to the true mission of the church.
So let’s say you show up at the same church whenever you attend, but you sit in the back row, anonymously. You don’t engage, don’t serve, don’t invite, don’t join the mission. You just…sit.
That’s not much different than just consumption, except it’s analog, not digital.
It’s hard to build the future of the church on someone who consumes and never contributes. And it’s hard to build a meaningful, resilient life, when all you do is consume, not contribute.
So contribute. Serve. Invite. Give. Do community.
You’re called to be the church, not just attend one.
If you find your church attendance declining or evaporating, ask yourself:
www.careynieuwhof.com
“I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:12-13).
Today’s passage contains one of the most well-known and well-loved passages of scripture. You can find it on t-shirts, coffee mugs, decorative signs, sports programs, and more. It’s a passage used to encourage people in their career endeavors, sports, anything where a person needs a push to take a challenge and perform well. Just as “All things are possible with God,” so too this passage tells us nothing is impossible for us as well. We can accomplish whatever we set our hearts to. “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” How encouraging! There’s only one thing wrong with that understanding.
It’s completely false.
If you want to understand what a passage of scripture really means, you have to go to its context. And the context of this passage is a difficult one. Look at what Paul was facing just before he uttered those so-well-loved words. “I know how to be brought low.” What? Brought low? “I know how to abound.” Hey, that’s more like it! “I have learned the secret of facing…hunger…and need.”
Considering the context of this passage it’s better to translate it this way, “I can endure all things through him who strengthens me.” This makes more sense. So, what is the secret? It is to stay focused on the person of Jesus. Look at Paul’s last few words, “…through HIM who strengthens me.” It is our focus on Jesus that gets us through the trials we face; even if that trial is being wrongly imprisoned in a filthy, smelling, disease-infested cell.
What are you faced with today?
Memory Verse
“I can [endure] all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).
Application
Write down this memory verse and keep it with you. When trials come, no matter how large or small, bring it to your mind and purpose to move forward, relaying on Christ.
For those of us who follow Christ, it’s important to understand “why” we choose to live intentionally. If we take the book of Ephesians and split it into two halves, the first three chapters is the orthodoxy of our faith – our position in Christ. It’s all about God’s intentional love for us. Then in Chapter 4, moving to the last three chapters, Paul turns in a different direction. He ends the first half of Ephesians saying, as a result of everything I just said in the first three chapters, here is how I want you to live your life (paraphrased). We’ll look at the first three chapters in this blog and the last three in the next one.
When we talk to our children, we often focus on what we want them to do. Maybe we need to spend a little more time talking about why what we want them to do is important. Take the opportunity to tell them why – “I want you to grow up and honor God.” “I want you to grow up and be a good father, someday.” Let’s look at three reasons we should choose to live intentionally.
1. We should choose to live intentionally because of God’s intentional love for us.
How do we know that God loves us? Here are four ways He demonstrates His love to us:
· The God of the universe chose you. In the grand scheme of things, God had a plan for you, and He chose you. Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, (Ephesians 1:4 NKJV).
· He adopted you. Something about adoption is powerful thing. To understand that God actually adopted you and me into his kingdom, into his family, lets look at the next verse. Having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will (v.5). Every time I read that verse, I realize the great gift that it really is – the God of the Universe chose to adopt you and me, and bring us into His kingdom.
· He redeemed you. In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace (v. 7). This is powerful.
· He gave you the Holy Spirit. In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise (v. 13). God uses the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, to build our lives and to allow us to really function in the world in which we live today.
2. Another reason why we live intentionally is because God gets the glory. When we live intentionally in Him, all the glory is His.
Here are three examples of how He gets the glory:
· He made you alive. In you he made alive who were dead in trespasses and sins (Ephesians 2:1). That means we were dead spiritually and He made you alive.
· He saved you by grace. For by grace you have been saved through faith and that not of yourselves. It is a gift of God not of works lest anyone should boast (v. 8-9).
· He made you for good works. We talk about the difference between being work-oriented. It’s clearly that God has made us to be about doing good works. For we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them (v. 10).
3. We should live intentionally because God said so. When Daddy says so, Daddy means it, right?
· He made gentiles fellow heirs. He reached out to include all of us and allowed us to choose to be grafted in to become part of the Kingdom. Paul said, The gentiles should be fellow heirs of the same body and partakers of his promise in Christ through the Gospel (Ephesians 2:19).
The first three chapters contain the orthodoxy of our faith – our position in Christ. We covered that in part one of this blog. Then Paul turns in a different direction saying, as a result of everything I just said in the first three chapters, here is how I want you to live your life (paraphrased). Now we are going to see in these last three chapters briefly how we are to live our lives intentionally.
1. Walk worthy of your calling. The very next sentence from the pen of the Apostle Paul, says: Therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, I beseech you to have a walk worthy of the calling with you were called (Ephesians 4:1). Paul turns from belief to behavior.
2. Be renewed in the spirit of your mind. Our minds are the seed of what gets us in trouble in our lives. If you are having problems in your relationships, it starts right here.
As you read through Ephesians, our head, heart, hands, thinking, emotions and our behavior can either be under the authority of the Holy Spirit, or they can be under our own control. Paul tells us here to be renewed in the spirit of your minds. You do that by prayer, by reading, by meditating and by telling yourself the truth.
3. Work with your own hands. Let him who stole steal no longer, but, rather, let him labor working with his hands what is good that he may have something to give him who has need (Ephesians 4:28 ESV).
4. Use your time wisely. Making the best use of the time, because the days are evil (Ephesians 5:16). Time is a precious thing.
Today, we occupy our time with a lot of distractions and not use the time that God’s given us. Really, it’s all we have. We get about 27,000 days on the planet (see Psalm 90:12). I can’t think of anything more valuable than using the time we have to reach someone for Christ.
5. Be filled with the spirit (Ephesians 5:18). The Holy Spirit is in you. He comes into our lives when we accept Him as our Savior. But every day there we need to make sure He is filling every aspect of our lives. There’s power when we humbly ask the spirit of God to direct us in how we are going to live our lives every day.
6. Work as unto the Lord. Paul said, With goodwill doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men (Ephesians 6:7). Ultimately what matters is what we do for God.
Without a why in life, the how and the what really doesn’t matter all that much, because many of us live in the what and how of life. What do we do? How do we do it? And we’re busy, but if we don’t get the why clearer, then we live our lives in a way that sometimes we wake up and say why am I doing this? Whys are important because then you better understand the how and what.
www.intentionalliving.com. Used by permission.
Has there been a person in your life you thought you knew, but you really didn’t? Could that person be Jesus?
Stay with me as we explore this pivotal question!
The anchor that keeps us grounded throughout our journey of faith is a revelation of Jesus. Because of this anchor, Paul could not be shaken, confessing, “That is why I am suffering here in prison. But I am not ashamed of it, for I know the one in whom I trust, and I am sure that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until the day of His return” (2 Timothy 1:12 NLT). Notice Paul does not say, “I know what I believe” but rather, “I know the One in whom I believe.” The Amplified Bible records, “I know Him [and I am personally acquainted with Him] whom I have believed [with absolute trust and confidence in Him and in the truth of His deity].” Simply stated: Paul possessed a personal revelation of Jesus. He knew Jesus intimately.
Many can recite facts about Jesus—much like many can recite facts about their favorite celebrities. However, knowing about someone does not equate to knowing them personally. Can you too say with conviction, “I know the One in whom I believe”
www.messengerinternational.org.
Lovely one, Jesus is not a philosophy; He is a person. Therefore, believing in Jesus is more than adhering to a creed; it’s an awakening of the heart. We see Him for Who He really is—the Son of God.
In the sixteenth chapter of the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus entered the region of Caesarea Philippi and asked His disciples, “Who do men say that I, the Son of Man, am?” (Verse 13 NKJV). Several disciples answered promptly. The common response was, “Some say John the Baptist, some Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets” (Verse 14). Once the opinions of the crowd were shared, Jesus looked at them and asked them directly, “But who do you say that I am?” (Verse 15).
There was a moment of silence as they were confronted by a moment of truth. The men who were so eager to air the opinions of others were now lost for words. With this confrontation came the realization that they had no answer—except for the fact that they were living off the speculations of others, rather than establishing in their own hearts who Jesus really was.
Simon, whom Jesus renamed Peter, was the only one of the disciples who could answer. With boldness, he confessed, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God” (Verse 16). With a smile and a sparkle in His eyes, Jesus responded, “Blessed are you . . . for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven” (Verse 17). One translation says, “My Father has supernaturally revealed this to you” (TPT).
The source of Peter’s revelation was God Himself, not the opinion of man. It came through direct revelation. This is what Jesus meant when He shared, “The only way people come to Me is by the Father who sent Me—He pulls on their hearts to embrace Me . . . It has been written by the prophets, ‘They will all be taught by God Himself.’ If you are really listening to the Father and learning directly from Him, you will come to Me’” (John 6:44–45 TPT).
So we see clearly that the illuminated truth of Jesus must be solidified in our heart. Jesus firmly stated, “And this truth of who I am will be the bedrock foundation of which I will build my church—My legislative assembly, and the power of death will not be able to overpower it!” (Matthew 16:18 TPT).
The revelation of Jesus is the foundation the church will be grounded on. Without this truth firmly planted within us, we’ll easily be swayed by the shifting current of public opinion. Beloved, there is a stability that results from revelation knowledge.
Are you living off secondhand information about Jesus? Who do you say that He is? Are you convinced that Jesus is the Son of God?
How do you answer the charge that America was not founded on Christian principles since there seems to be no religious language in the US Constitution? Here’s one answer: Christian language was in America’s State constitutions. And there was a lot of it.
Here is language from America’s first 24 State Constitutions filled with Christian references. The reason the US Constitution did not feature such language was because the State Constitutions already had it. This was the same reason why the Bill of Rights did not appear in the Constitution until 4 years after the US Constitution was written, the State versions already had their own Declarations of Rights.
I hope you find this interesting and inspiring. Please share.
North Carolina—1776
Section 32. That no person who shall deny the being of God, or the truth of the protestant religion, or the Divine authority of the Old or New Testaments, or who shall hold religious principles incompatible with the freedom and safety of the state, shall be capable of holding any office, or place of trust or profit, in the civil department within this state.
Article IV, Section 2. The thirty second of the Constitution shall be amended to read as follows: No person who shall deny the being of God, or the truth of the Christian religion, or the Divine authority of the Old or New Testaments, or who shall hold religious principles incompatible with the freedom and safety of the state, shall be capable of holding any office, or place of trust or profit, in the civil department within this state.
Section 34. That there shall be no establishment of any one religious church or denomination in this state, in preference to any other; neither shall any person, on any pretense whatsoever, be compelled to attend any place of worship contrary to his own faith or judgment, nor be obliged to pay for the purchase of any glebe or the building of any house of worship, or for the maintenance of any minister or ministry, contrary to what he believes right, or has voluntarily and personally engaged to perform; but all persons shall be at liberty to exercise their own mode of worship: Provided that nothing herein contained that be construed to exempt preachers of treasonable or seditious discourses, from legal trial and punishment.
Right 19 That all men have a natural and unalienable right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own conscience.
Right 21 That a frequent reccurence to fundamental principles is absolutely necessary to the preserve the blessings of liberty.
New Jersey—1777
Article 18 That no person, shall ever within this colony, be deprived of the inestimable privilege of worshipping Almighty God in a manner agreeable to the dictates of his own conscience: nor under any pretense whatever, be compelled to attend any place of worship, contrary to his own faith and judgment; nor shall any person in this colony ever be obliged to pay tithes, taxes, or any other rates, for the purposes of building or repairing any other church or churches, places or places of worship, or for the maintenance of any minister or ministry, contrary to what he believes to be right, or has deliberately and voluntarily engaged himself to perform.
Article 19. That there shall be no establishment of any one religious sect in this province in preference to another; and that no protestant inhabitant of this colony shall be denied the enjoyment of any civil right, merely on account of his religious principle; but that all persons professing a belief in the faith of any protestant sect, who shall demean themselves peaceably under the government, as hereby established, shall be capable of being elected into any office of profit, or trust, or being a member of either branch of the legislature, and shall fully and freely enjoy every privilege and immunity enjoyed by others their fellow subjects.
Massachusetts—1780
Part I, Article 2. It is the right, as well as the duty, of all men in society, publicly, and at stated seasons, to worship the Supreme Being, the Great Creator and Preserver of the Universe. And no subject shall be hurt, molested, or restrained in his person, liberty, or estate, for worshiping God in the manner and seasons most agreeable to the dictates of his own conscience; or for his religious profession, or sentiments; provided he doth not disturb the public peace, or obstruct others in their religious worship.
Part I, Article 3. As the happiness of a people, and good order and preservation of civil government, essentially depend upon piety, religion, and morality; and as these cannot be generally diffused throughout the community, but they the institution of a public worship of God, and of public institutions in piety, religion, and morality; therefore, to promote their happiness, and to secure the good order and preservation of their government, the people of this commonwealth have a right to invest their legislature with power to authorize and require, and the legislature shall, from time to time, authorize and require, the several towns, parishes, precincts, and other bodies politic, or religious societies, to make suitable provision, at their own expense, for the institution of the public worship of God, and of the support ant maintenance of public protestant teachers of piety, religion, and morality in all cases, where such provision shall not be made voluntarily.
All the people of the commonwealth have a right to, and do, invest their legislature, with authority to enjoin upon all the subjects an attendance upon the instructions of public teachers, as foresaid, at stated times and seasons, if there be anyone whose instructions they cannot conscientiously and conveniently attend:— Provided, notwithstanding, that the several towns, parishes, precincts, and other bodies politic, or religious societies, shall, at all times, have the exclusive right of electing their public teachers, and contract with them for their support and maintenance.
All monies paid by the subject to the support of public worship, and of public teachers aforesaid, shall, if he require it, be uniformly applied to the subject of the public teacher or teachers of his own religious sect or denomination, provided there be any, on whose instructions he attends; otherwise it may be paid towards the support of the teacher or teachers of the parish or precinct in which the said monies are raised.
And every denomination of Christians, demeaning themselves peaceably, and as good subjects of the commonwealth, shall be equally under the protection of the law; and no subordination of any sect or denomination to another shall ever be established by law.
Part I, Article 18. A frequent recurrence to the fundamental principles of the Constitution, and a constant adherence to those of piety, justice, moderation, temperance, industry, and frugality, are absolutely necessary to preserve the advantages of liberty, and to maintain a free government. The people ought, consequently, to have a particular attention to all those principles, in the choice of their officers and representatives, they shall have the right, to require of their lawgivers, and magistrates, an exact and constant observance of them, in the formation and execution of all laws necessary for the good administration of the commonwealth.
Chapter VI, Article I Any person chosen governor or lieutenant–governor, counselor, senator or representative, and accepting the trust, shall, before he proceed to execute the duties of his place or office, make and subscribe the declaration, viz.
I, A.B., do declare that I believe the Christian religion, and have a firm persuasion of its truth; and that I am seized and possessed, in my own right, of the property required by the Constitution, as one qualification to the office or place to which I am elected.
New Hampshire—1792
Part I, Article 6 As morality and piety, rightly grounded on evangelical principles, will give the best and greatest security to government, and will lay, in the hearts of men, the strongest obligations to due subjection; and as the knowledge of these is most likely to be propagated through a society by the institution of the public worship of the Deity, and of public instruction in morality and religion; therefore, to promote these important purposes, the people of this state have a right to empower, and do hereby fully empower, their legislature, to authorize, from time to time, the several towns, parishes, bodies corporate, or religious societies, within this state, to make adequate provision at their own expense, for the support and maintenance of public protestant teachers of piety, religion and morality:
Provided notwithstanding, that the several towns, parishes, bodies corporate or religious societies, shall at all times, have the exclusive right of electing their own public teachers, and of contracting with them for their support and maintenance: And no person, of any one particular religious sect or denomination, shall ever be compelled to pay towards the support of the teacher or teachers of another persuasion, sect. or denomination.
And every denomination of Christians, demeaning themselves quietly, and as good citizens of the state, shall be under the equal protection of the law: and no subordination of any one sect or denomination to another, shall ever be established by law.
And nothing herein shall be understood to affect any former contracts made for the support of the ministry; but all such contracts shall remain, and shall be in the same state, as if this Constitution had not been made.
Part I, Article 38. A frequent recurrence to the fundamental principles of the Constitution, and a constant adherence to justice, moderation, temperance, industry, and frugality, and all the social virtues, are indispensably necessary to preserve the blessings of liberty and good government. The people ought, therefore, to have a particular regard to all those principles, in the choice of their officers and representatives: and they have the right, to require of their lawgivers, and magistrates, an exact and constant observance of them, in the formation and execution of the laws necessary for the good administration of the government.
Vermont—1793
Chapter I, Article 3. That all men have natural and unalienable right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own consciences and understandings, as in their opinion shall be regulated by the Word of God; and that no man ought to, or of right can, be compelled to attend any religious worship, or erect or support any place of worship, or maintain any minister, contrary to the dictates of his conscience; nor can any man be justly deprived or abridged of any civil right as a citizen, on account of his religious sentiments or peculiar mode of religious worship; and that no authority can or ought to be vested in, or assumed by, any power whatever, that shall in any case interfere with, or in any manner control, the rights of conscience and the free exercise of religious worship. Nevertheless, every sect or denomination of Christians ought to observe the Sabbath, Lord’s Day, and keep up some sort of religious worship, which to them shall seem most agreeable to the revealed will of God.
Chapter I, Article 18. A frequent recurrence to the fundamental principles, and firm adherence to justice, moderation, temperance, industry, and frugality, are absolutely necessary to preserve the blessings of liberty and keep government free; the people ought, therefore, to pay particular attention to these points, in the choice of officers and representatives, and have the right, in a legal way, to exact a due and constant regard for them, from their legislators, and magistrates, in making and executing such laws as are necessary for the good government of the state.
Chapter II, Section 41. Laws for the encouragement of virtue and prevention of vice and immorality, ought to be constantly kept in force and duly executed: and a competent number of schools ought to be maintained in each town, for the convenient instruction of youth; and one or more grammar schools be incorporated, and properly supported, in each county in this state. And all religious societies or bodies of men that may be hereafter united or incorporated for the advancement of religion and learning, or for other pious and charitable purposes, shall be encouraged and protected in the enjoyment of the privileges , immunities, and estates, which they in justice ought to enjoy, under such regulations as the General Assembly of this state shall direct.
Georgia—1798
Article II, Sec. 9 Divorces shall not be granted by the legislature, until the parties shall have a fair trial before the superior court, and a verdict shall have been obtained, authorizing a divorce upon legal principles. And in such cases, two–thirds of each branch of the legislature may pass acts of divorce accordingly.
Article IV, Sec. 10 No person within this state shall, upon any pretense, be deprived of the inestimable privilege of worshipping God in a manner agreeable to his own conscience, nor be compelled to attend any place of worship contrary to his own faith and judgment; nor shall he every be obliged to pay tithes, taxes, or any other rate, for the building or repairing of any place of worship, or for the maintenance of any minister or ministry, contrary to what he believes to be right, or has voluntarily engaged himself to do. No one religious sect shall every be established in this state, in preference to any other; nor shall any person be denied the enjoyment of any civil right, merely on account of his religious principles.
Kentucky—1799
Article II, Sec. 26 No person, while he continues to exercise the function of a clergyman, priest, or teacher of any religious persuasion, society, or sect; nor whilst he holds or exercises any office of profit under this commonwealth, shall be eligible to the General Assembly; except attorney’s at law, justices of the peace, and militia officers: Provided that justices of the courts of quarter sessions shall be ineligible so long as any compensation may be allowed them for their services: Provided, also, that attorneys for the commonwealth, who receive a fixed annual salary from the public treasury, shall be ineligible.
Ohio—1802
Article VIII, Sec 3. That all men have a natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own conscience; that no man shall be compelled to attend, erect, or support any place of worship, or to maintain any ministry, against his consent; and that no preference shall ever be given by law to any religious society or mode of worship: and that no religious test shall be required as a qualification to any office or trust or profit. But religion, morality, and knowledge, being essentially necessary to the government, and the happiness of mankind, schools, and the means of instruction, shall for ever be encouraged by legislative provision, not inconsistent with the rights of conscience.
Virginia—1830
Right 16. That religion, or the duty which we owe to our Creator, and the manner of discharging it, can be directed only by reason and conviction, not by force or violence; and therefore all men are equally entitled to the free exercise of religion, according to the dictates of conscience and that it is the mutual duty of all to practice Christian forbearance and love, and charity towards each other.
South Carolina—1808
Article I, Section 23. And whereas the ministers of the Gospel are, by their profession, dedicated to the service of God and the care of souls, and ought not to be diverted from the great duties of their functions: therefore, no minister of the Gospel, or public preacher, of any religious persuasion, whilst he continues in the exercise of his pastoral functions, shall be eligible to the office of governor, lieutenant–governor, or a seat in the senate or house of representatives.
Article VIII, Sec. 1 The free exercise and enjoyment of religious profession and worship, without discrimination or preference shall, for ever hereafter, be allowed within this state to all mankind: Provided that the liberty of conscience thereby declared, shall not be so construed as to excuse acts of licentiousness, or justify practices inconsistent with the peace or safety of this state
Maryland—1812
Right 33. That as it is the duty of every man to worship God in such manner as he thinks is most acceptable to him, all persons professing the Christian religion are equally entitled to protection of their religious liberty; wherefore, no person ought by law to be molested in his person or estate, on account of his religious persuasion or profession, or for his religious practice; unless, under colour of religion, any man should disturb the good order, peace, or safety of the state, or shall infringe the laws of morality, or injure others in their natural, civil, or religious rights; nor ought any person to be compelled to frequent or maintain any place of worship, or any particular ministry; (yet the legislature may, in their discretion, lay a general and equal tax for the support of the Christian religion: leaving to each individual the power of appointing the payment over the money collected from him, to the support of any particular place of worship or minister, or for the benefit of the poor of his own denomination, or the poor in general of any particular county;) but the churches, chapels, glebe, and all other property, now belonging to the church of England, ought to remain to the church of England forever. And all acts of assembly lately passed, for collecting monies for building, or repairing particular churches or chapels of ease, shall continue in force, and be executed, unless the legislature shall, by act, supersede or repeal the same: but no county court shall assess any quantity or tobacco, or sum of money, hereafter, on the application of any vestryman or church wardens; and every incumbent of the church of England, who hath remained in his parish, and hath performed his duty, shall be entitled to receive the provision and support established by the act entitled, “and act for the support of the clergy in of the Church of England for this province,” till the November court of this present year, to be held for the county in which his parish shall lie, or partly lie, or for such a time as he hath remained in his parish, and performed his duty.
Right #34. That every gift, sale, or devise of lands, to any minister, public teacher, or preacher of the Gospel, as such, or to any religious sect, order, or denomination, or to or for the support, use, or benefit or, or in trust for, any minister, public teacher, or preacher of the Gospel, as such, or to any religious sect, order, or denomination; and every gift, or sale of goods or chattels, to go in succession, or to take place after the death of the seller or donor, to or for such support, use or benefit, and also every devise of good or chattels to or for the support, use, or any benefit of any minister, public teacher, or preacher of the Gospel, as such, or any religious order, sect, or denomination, without leave of the legislature, shall be void, except always any sale, gift, lease, or devise of any quantity of land not exceeding two acres, for a church, meeting, or other house of worship, and for burying ground, which shall be improved, enjoyed, or used only for such purpose, or such sale, gift, lease, or devise, shall be void.
Right #35 That no other test or qualification ought to be required, on admission to any office of trust or profit, than such oath of support and fidelity to this state, and such oath of office, as shall be directed by this convention or the legislature of this state, and a declaration of the belief in the Christian religion.
Right #36 That the manner of administering the oath to any person, ought to be such as those of the religious persuasion, profession, or denomination, of which such person is one, generally esteem the most effectual confirmation of the attestation of the Divine Being: and that the people called Quakers, those called Tunkers, and those called Menonists, holding unlawful to take an oath on any occasion, ought to be allowed to make their solemn affirmation in the manner that Quakers have been heretofore allowed to affirm; and to be the same avail as an oath in all such cases as the affirmation of Quakers hath been allowed and accepted within this state instead of an oath. And further, on such affirmation, warrants to search for stolen goods, or the apprehension or commitment of offenders, ought to be granted, or security for the peace awarded, and Quakers, Tunkers, or Menonists ought also on their solemn affirmation aforesaid, to be admitted as witnesses in all criminal cases, [not capital.]
Louisiana—1812
Article II, Sec. 22. No person, while he continues to exercise the function of a clergyman, priest, or teacher, of any religious persuasion, society, or sect, shall be eligible to the General Assembly, or to any office of profit or trust in this state.
Indiana—1816
Article I, Sec. 3 That all men have a natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own consciences: that no man shall be compelled to attend, erect, or support any place of worship, or to maintain any ministry, against his consent: that no human authority can, in any case whatsoever, control or interfere with the rights of conscience: and that no preference shall ever be given by law to any religious societies or modes of worship; and that no religious test shall be required as a qualification to any office of trust or profit.
Illinois—1818
Article VIII, Sec. 3 That all men have a natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own conscience; that no man can of right be compelled to attend, erect, or support any place of worship, or to maintain any ministry, against his consent; and that no human authority can in any case whatsoever, control or interfere with the rights of conscience: and that no preference shall ever be given by law to any religious establishments or mode of worship
Article VIII, Sec 4 That no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office of public trust under this state.
Article VIII, Sec. 18 That a frequent recurrence to the fundamental principles of civil government is absolutely necessary to preserve the blessings of liberty.
Connecticut—1818
Article I, Sec. 3. The exercise and enjoyment of religious profession and worship, without discrimination, shall forever be free to all persons in this state, provided that the right hereby declared and established shall not be so construed as to excuse acts of licentiousness, or to justify practices inconsistent with the peace and safety of the state.
Article I, Sec. 4. No preference shall ever be given by law to any Christian sect or mode of worship.
Article VII, Sec. 1. It being the duty of all men to worship the Supreme Being, the great Creator and Preserver of the Universe, and their right to render that worship in the mode most consistent with the dictates of their consciences: no person shall, by law, be compelled to join or support, nor be classed with, or associated to, any congregation, church, or religious association. But every person now belonging to such congregation, church, or religious association, shall remain a member thereof, until he shall have separated himself therefrom, in the manner hereinafter provided. And each and every society and denomination of Christians in this state, shall have and enjoy the same and equal powers, rights, and privileges: and shall have the power and authority to support and maintain the ministers or teachers of their respective denominations, and to build and repair houses for public worship, by a tax on the members of any such society only, to be laid by a major vote of the legal voters assembled at any society meeting, warned and held according to law, or in any other manner.
Article VII, Sec. 2 If any person shall choose to separate himself from the society or denomination of Christians to which he may belong, and shall leave a written notice thereof with the clerk of such society, he shall thereupon no longer be liable for any future expenses which may be incurred by said society.
Maine—1819
Article I, Sec. 3. All men have a natural and unalienable right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own consciences; and no one shall be hurt, molested, or restrained in his person, liberty, or estate, for worshipping God in the manner and season most agreeable to the dictates of his own conscience, nor for his religious profession or sentiments, provided he does not disturb the public peace, nor obstruct others in their religious worship;—and all persons demeaning themselves peaceably, as good members of the state, shall be equally under the protection of the laws, and no subordination nor preference, of any one sect or denomination to another, shall ever be established by law, nor shall any religious test be required as a qualification for any office or trust under this state; and all religious societies in this state, whether incorporate, or unincorporated, shall at all times have the exclusive right of electing their public teachers, and contracting with them for their support and maintenance.
Alabama—1819
Article I, Sec. 3. No person within this state, upon any pretense, shall be deprived of the inestimable privilege of worshipping God in the manner most agreeable to his own conscience; nor be compelled to attend any place or worship; nor shall anyone every be obliged to pay any tithes, taxes, or other rate, for the building or repairing any place of worship, or for the maintenance of any minister or ministry.
Article I, Sec. 4. No human authority ought, in any case whatsoever, to control or interfere with the rights of conscience.
Article I, Sec. 5. No person shall be hurt, molested or restrained, in his religious profession, sentiments, or persuasions, provided he does not disturb others in their religious worship.
Article I, Sec. 6. The civil rights, privileges, or capacities of any citizen, shall in no way be diminished, or enlarged, on account of his religious principles.
Article I, Sec. 7. There shall be no establishment of religion by law; no preference shall ever be given by law to any religious sect, society, denomination, or mode of worship: and no religious test shall every be required as a qualification to any office or public trust within this state.
Article VI, Sec. 13. Divorces from the bonds of matrimony shall not be granted but for cases provided for by law, by suit in chancery: and no decree for such divorce shall have effect until the same shall be sanctioned by two-thirds of both houses of the General Assembly.
Missouri—1820
Article XIII, Sec. 4. That all men have a natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their own consciences; that no man can be compelled to erect, support, or attend any place of worship, or to maintain any minister of the Gospel or teacher of religion; that no human authority can control or interfere with the rights on conscience; that no person can ever be hurt, molested, or restrained in his religious profession, or sentiments, if he does not disturb others in their religious worship.
Article XIII, Sec. 5. That no person, on account of his religious opinions, can be rendered ineligible to any office of trust or profit under this state; that no preference can every be given by law to any sect or mode of worship; and that no religious corporation can every be established in this state.
Article XIII, Sec. 18. That no person who is religiously scrupulous of bearing arms can be compelled to do so, but may be compelled to pay an equivalent for military service, in such manner as shall be prescribed by law,; and that no priest, preacher of the Gospel, or teacher of any religious persuasion or sect, regularly ordained as such, be subject to militia duty, or compelled to bear arms.
New York—1821
Article VII, Sec. 3. The free exercise of religious profession and worship, without discrimination or preference, shall forever be allowed in this state to all mankind: but the liberty of conscience hereby secured shall not be so construed as to excuse acts of licentiousness, or justify practices inconsistent with the peace and safety of this state.
Article VII, Sec. 4. And whereas the ministers of the Gospel are, by their profession, dedicated to the service of God , and the care of souls, and ought not to be diverted from the great duties of their functions: therefore, no minister of the Gospel, or priest of any denomination whatsoever, shall, at any time hereafter, under any pretense or description whatever, be eligible of holding any civil or military office or place within this state.
Article VII, Sec. 5. The militia of the state shall, at all time hereafter, be armed and disciplined, and in readiness for service; but all such inhabitants of this state, of any religious denomination whatever, as from scruples of conscience may be averse to bearing arms, shall be excused therefrom, by paying to this state an equivalent in money: and the legislature shall provide by law for the collection of such equivalent to be estimated according to the expense in time and money of an ordinary able-bodied militia man.
Delaware—1831
Article I, Sec. 1. Although it is the duty of all men to frequently assemble together for the public worship f the Author of the Universe, and piety and morality, on which the prosperity of communities depends, are thereby promoted; yet no man shall, or ought to be compelled to attend any religious worship, to contribute to the erection or support of any place of worship, or be the maintenance of any ministry, against his own free will and consent; and no power shall be, or ought to be vested in or assumed by any magistrate, that shall in any case interfere with, or in any manner control the rights of conscience, in the free exercise of religious worship: nor shall a preference be given by law to any religious societies, denominations, or modes of worship.
Article I, Sec. 2. No religious test shall be required as a qualification to any office, or public trust, under this state.
Article VII, Sec. 8. The rights, privileges, immunities, and estates of religious societies and corporate bodies shall remain as if the constitution of this state had not been altered. No [ordained] clergyman or [ordained] preacher of the Gospel of any denomination shall be capable of holding any civil office in the state, or of being a member of either branch of the legislature while he continues in the exercise of the pastoral or clerical functions.
Tennessee—1834
Article I, Sec. 4. That no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust within this state.
Article IX, Sec. 1. Whereas the ministers of the Gospel are, by their profession, dedicated to the service of God, and the care of souls, and ought not to be diverted from the great duties of their functions: therefore, no minister of the Gospel, or priest of any denomination whatsoever, shall be eligible to a seat in either house of the legislature.
Article IX, Sec. 2. No person who denies the being of a God, or a future state of rewards and punishments, shall hold any office in the civil department of this state.
Article XI, Sec. 4. The legislature shall have no power to grant divorces, but may authorize the courts of justice to grant them for such causes as may be specified by law: provided that such laws be general and uniform in their operation throughout the state.
Pennsylvania—1838
Article IX, Sec. 4. That no person who acknowledges the being of a God and a future state of rewards and punishments, shall, on account of his religious sentiments, be disqualified to hold any office or place of trust or profit under this commonwealth.
Mississippi—1833
Article I, Sec. 3. The exercise of religious profession and worship, without discrimination, shall for ever be free to all persons in this state: provided that the right hereby declared and established shall not be so construed as to excuse acts of licentiousness, or justify practices inconsistent with the peace and safety of the state.
Article I, Sec. 4. No preference shall ever be given by law to any religious sect, or mode of worship.
Article I, Sec. 5. That no person shall be molested for his opinions on any subject whatever, nor suffer any civil or political incapacity, or acquire any civil or political advantage, in consequence of such opinions, except in cases provided for in this constitution.
Article VII, Sec. 5. No person who denies the being of a God, or a future state of rewards and punishment, shall hold any office in the civil department of this state.
Article VII, Sec. 14. Religion, morality, and knowledge, being necessary to good government, the preservation of liberty, and the happiness of mankind, schools, and the means of education, shall for ever be encouraged in this state.
Article VII, Sec. 15. Divorces from the bonds of matrimony shall not be granted, but in cases provided for by law, but suit in chancery.
Rhode Island
Section from original charter: Paragraph 3
Now know ye, that we being willing to encourage the hopeful undertaking of our said loyal and loving subjects, and to secure them in the free exercise and enjoyment of all the civil and religious rights appertaining to them, as our loving subjects: and to preserve unto them that liberty in the true Christian faith and worship of God which they have sought with so much travail, and with peaceable minds and loyal subjection to our royal progenitors and ourselves, to enjoy: and because some of the inhabitants of this same colony cannot, in their private opinion, conform to the public exercise of religion, according to the liturgy, form, and ceremonies of the church of England, to take or subscribe to the oaths or articles made and established in that behalf; and for that the same, by reason of the remote distances of those places, will, as we hope, be no breach of the unity and uniformity established in this nation, have therefore thought fit, and to hereby publish, grant, ordain, and declare, that our royal will and please is:
—
Paragraph 4 That no person within said colony, at any time hereafter, shall be anywise molested, punished, disquieted, or called in question, for any differences in opinion in matters of religion, who do not actually disturb the civil peace of our said colony; but that all and every person and persons may, from time to time, and at all times hereafter, freely and fully have and enjoy his own and their judgments and consciences, throughout the tract of land hereafter mentioned, they behaving themselves, peaceably and quietly, and not using this liberty to licentiousness and profaneness, nor to the civil injury or outward disturbance of others; any laws, statute, or clause therein contained, or to be contained, usage, or custom of the realm, to the contrary hereof, in any wise notwithstanding.
Paragraph 5 And that they may be in the better capacity to defend themselves, in their just rights and liberties, against all the enemies of the Christian faith, and others, in all respects, we have further thought fit….
The Knot recently did a study and found that over the past seven years, weddings in churches have dropped from 41% to 26%.[i] Wow. Did you hear that? Only a quarter of weddings now take place in a church.
This fact in and of itself isn’t catastrophic. I don’t believe that one must get married in the church for it to be a “real” wedding. However, it does speak to a secularizing trend that is becoming more and more apparent. The more disconcerting fact for me is that 43% of weddings are now officiated by a friend, up from 29% seven years ago.[ii] While the Bible doesn’t say you need a pastor to officiate your wedding, choosing a (non-pastor) friend to officiate your wedding makes a statement.
Essentially, what you’re saying when you have a friend instead of a pastor officiate is that your wedding is about celebrating your relationship with friends. While that’s a wonderful part of what a wedding should be, but it shouldn’t be what your wedding is primarily about.
If you are considering marriage at some point in the future, let me urge you to consider making your marriage about something bigger than just a great party with friends.
Which leads us to ask, what is bigger than celebrating your relationship? There is one thing bigger: it is celebrating what marriage is really about: Jesus’ love for the church. In Ephesians 5, Paul explains that marriage is ultimately a pointer to Jesus’ great love for us. He says, “This mystery [of marriage] is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” The most important thing about your wedding (and marriage!) is that it should point to Christ’s love for the church even more than your love for one another. Your love for one another should point to Jesus’ love for you.
1) Meet with your pastor or a Christian counselor before you get engaged. Hardly anyone does this today. However, seeking God-honoring Christian counseling beforehand is a powerful statement that you are seeking godly wisdom in your relationship before anyone or anything else.
2) Go through your church’s premarital classes or go through premarital counseling with your pastor.
3) Have your pastor officiate your wedding. Ask your pastor how you can best honor Christ in your wedding.
4) Read a book on marriage with your fiancé. I recommend Timothy and Kathy Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage, Dan Allender and Tremper Longman’s Intimate Allies, and Gary Thomas’s Sacred Marriage.
5) Be a good financial steward with your wedding. The average wedding costs over $35,000[iii], more than 85% of the average American salary.[iv] Starting your marriage in a financial hole doesn’t honor Christ.
6) Use the traditional vows. I know, this makes me sound like a fuddy duddy, but anchoring your vows in vows that have been spoken millions of times over hundreds of years instead of your feelings for your significant other at a particular time and place points to the reality that you are entering a covenant bigger than yourselves.
7) Speak of the importance of God’s love wherever you can: your invitation, bulletin, and in personal comments during the service and reception.
8) Pray! Pray that Christ would be glorified through your wedding. Include prayer in your time with your wedding party and in your reception.
A wedding is a beautiful thing! What a joy to consider marriage. I would love to hear your thoughts on how you think you can best honor Christ in your wedding.
www.thebeehive.live. Used by permission.
[i] https://factsandtrends.net/2018/05/31/why-no-one-may-be-getting-married-at-your-church-this-summer/
[ii] https://factsandtrends.net/2018/05/31/why-no-one-may-be-getting-married-at-your-church-this-summer/
[iii] https://www.marketwatch.com/story/what-the-average-american-wedding-looks-like—-and-costs-2017-02-10
[iv] https://www.cnbc.com/2017/08/24/how-much-americans-earn-at-every-age.html
I recently gave a talk on revival, and I want to share some thoughts from it. It’s difficult to find the right word for what we mean when we talk about revival. “Renewal” is almost too soft a word, and “revival” has too many dated connotations nowadays.
But the older definition of revival is helpful. It refers to a time when the ordinary operations of the Holy Spirit—not signs and wonders, but the conviction of sin, conversion, assurance of salvation and a sense of the reality of Jesus Christ on the heart—are intensified, so that you see growth in the quality of the faith in the people in your church, and a great growth in numbers and conversions as well.
In a revival, sleepy Christians wake up, nominal Christians get converted, and non-Christians get reached. A sleepy Christian may believe they’re a Christian, but they don’t have a real sense of God’s holiness, their own sin, or the depth of his grace. They may be a moralist or a relativist, or living inconsistent lives.
Nominal Christians may be going to church, but have never really been convicted of sin or received salvation personally. When sleepy and nominal Christians get revived, attractive and bold in their witness, people who would never have believed before begin to get converted.
So how do you wake up sleepy Christians and convert nominal Christians? Let me give you what I would call my modernized American versions of the kinds of questions I would ask people if I was trying to get them to really think about whether or not they know Christ. These questions are adapted from The Experience Meeting by William Williams, based on the Welsh revivals during the Great Awakening. He would ask people to share about these types of questions in small group settings each week:
How real has God been to your heart this week? How clear and vivid is your assurance and certainty of God’s forgiveness and fatherly love? To what degree is that real to you right now?
Are you having any particular seasons of delight in God? Do you really sense his presence in your life, sense him giving you his love?
Have you been finding Scripture to be alive and active? Instead of just being a book, do you feel like Scripture is coming after you?
Are you finding certain biblical promises extremely precious and encouraging? Which ones?
Are you finding God’s challenging you or calling you to something through the Word? In what ways?
Are you finding God’s grace more glorious and moving now than you have in the past? Are you conscious of a growing sense of the evil of your heart, and in response, a growing dependence on and grasp of the preciousness of the mercy of God?
Put together, that is a growing understanding of grace.
Used by permission. Redeemer City to City.
Paul teaches in Philippians 2 that God’s children are to be positive, not grumbling or doubting so that they shine like lights in the midst of a wicked, dark world. Christian’s faith and peace should be contagious. Paul doesn’t mind his suffering in jail if his spiritual children are ready for the return of Christ.
Preached at Cornerstone Church, Simi Valley. Used by permission.
What is the impact of the water we swim in in 21st century America?
Consumerism can infiltrate our spiritual lives. The notion that you have any decision to make on the church you attend would be a completely foreign idea to the experience of two millennia of Christians around the globe.
The point of such an observation isn’t to shame our current context or even lament the fragmentation of the church (those would be discussions for another day). Rather it helps us see the strangeness of the reality that, for most contemporary American Christians, there is a lengthy period of shopping for a church that happens when one moves or, for most, if anything happens within their church context that upsets or unsettles them. The days of being buried in the church where you were baptized and married are long gone for most.
And shopping really is the right word for this process. Looking through the eyes of the categories of our consumer identity, when we shop for a church we do so with our consumerist identity shaping that process:
1) “I’m broken, therefore I shop.” We look for churches that latch onto our deficits, insecurities, and offer fulfillment to those desires. The pulpit has always been a place where the timeless truth intersects with the cultural questions of the day, but that reality has been heightened in a consumer-driven world.
2) “I shop with others.” Our consumerism is driven by our pre-existing social networks. Unless you are completely new to a town and without a social network, your church shopping is driven by your network of friends. We go where we are already connected and accepted. In fact, it is totally normal that one frequents several churches where one connects with different sets of friends. For many there is no more loyalty to one local body than there is to the choice of shopping mall one chooses.
3) “I shop therefore I am.” We the consumer ask that the hour and fifteen minutes we spend in the worship center on Sunday morning create and be sufficient in shaping our Christian identity and experience. It should provide for us the feelings and catharsis we desire.
4) “I am in control.” We will serve the church and engage in calls to action, but only when we feel as though our needs are being met and that we can trust the leaders.
Believe it or not, I don’t think that the problems attendant with our consumerism are wholly bad. Imagine, for instance, how difficult it would be to truly form a congregational identity with the reality that the congregation was a “royal priesthood” (1 Pet 2:9) in a congregation located in Europe in AD 1200 where the identity of serfdom permeated the identity of the congregation. It would be extremely difficult for such a person to really own their identity as priest.
Doubtless however, there are serious problems with our engagement of the church as consumers. What does it look like to truly live lives where we are so invested in one another that we are characterized by the exhortation of one another (Heb 3:13), by our sharing meals and possessions with one another, and praying with one another (Acts 2:42-45)? Quite simply this engagement and giving of ourselves to our brothers and sisters in meaningful long-term relationships cannot happen as long as we are consumers of the product of our local churches and not participants and ministers of the gospel (Eph 4:12). When we stand as consumers of a product that is offered, we will never engage and own the ministry to which we are called. To paraphrase (rather cornily, I admit), John F. Kennedy, we should ask not what the church can do for us, rather ask what we can do for the church.
Ironically, it is often those who claim to be frustrated by the church’s capitulation to this consumerism who become church shoppers the moment change is introduced into the local church. A complaint is registered about that change (often cloaked in spiritual language) and they depart their congregation in search of a congregation that suits their preferences.
Churches and congregants alike can’t avoid the reality of the consumerist sea we swim in. But both those in church leadership and those who fill the worship centers are called to an awareness of and to fight against our impulses. We are no mere spiritual shopping mall, but are in fact “living stones… built up as a spiritual house” (1 Pet 2:4). Let us not, fellow Esaus, sell our birthright for the McStew offered us by McChurch.
https://www.thebeehive.live. Used by permission of the author.
Climbing into the car, I pasted on a brave smile and waved. “Bye, Sweetie,” I called out the window, swallowing hard to dissolve the lump in my throat. As I pulled out of the driveway, I watched my husband through the rearview mirror, growing smaller and farther away. That picture depicted exactly how I felt on Sundays; our marriage grew small and far away with miles between us. I longed to share the most important part of my life, Jesus, with the most important person in my life, my husband.
Once again, I was driving to church alone. Going to church by myself was the hardest thing I did all week, much more difficult at this point than when the kids were small and lived at home. They gave me accountability, a reason to go, and someone to sit with. Now I looked for excuses to stay home.
I always arrived after the service began. That way I didn’t have to greet everyone with a happy smile and tell people, “I’m fine,” when in truth I didn’t feel fine at all. My heart grieved. This unequally yoked life is a lonesome trek. After 22 years of walking alone in my Christianity, a large chunk of my life is separate from my spouse’s—lived singly. Sadly, Dean barely knows most of my Christian friends.
Spiritual singleness is a difficult role. Churches everywhere include married people who walk alone in their relationship with God. Their spouses either lack commitment or do not believe.
I was not as alone in this as I sometimes felt, and though it’s a solitary trek, I’ve learned that certain choices make it easier.
KNOWING MY LIMITATIONS
I avoid Sunday School classes for married adults, which only depress me and make contentment more difficult to achieve. For me, it’s like a magnifying glass, enlarging my grief and my total, complete aloneness. I also shun sad movies, because they leave me feeling down for days. I figure life’s sad enough—why torture myself? In other words, I know myself, and I don’t invite unnecessary struggles.
Kathy always enjoyed her class for married adults, even though her husband stayed home. I used to tease her, accusing her of being a Pollyanna. Attending a couples’ event alone didn’t daunt her. For me, it was worse than having surgery without anesthesia. So I play it safe and veer toward women’s ministry events. All the women are there alone, so it’s not an issue.
Since my kids are grown and gone from home, I also avoid family affairs. They only serve to remind me that my nest is empty and I walk alone with God. I attend a small church and am the only person without either a husband or a child. My pew is completely empty, except for me, and since adapting to a vacant nest has been a difficult adjustment in my life, I avoid tormenting myself more.
For me to feel I fit in, I needed to be involved in the service. I started by teaching a preschool Sunday School class. Since then, I’ve taught women, high school girls, and college girls. This is my niche, and I encourage you to find yours. Helping gives me a reason to get to church on Sundays, a place to belong, and a sense of purpose bigger than myself.
Every church has unfilled positions and needs more assistance. Ask God where He’s sending you. It’s commonly said that in any church 20 percent of the parishioners do 80 percent of the work. Think of the possibilities—nursery work, choir, hospital visitation. The list is limitless. Maybe God will use your gifts to start something new.
AGONY AND ECSTASY
“I think I’ll go with you today,” Ted informed Krista as she started out the door one Sunday morning.
Her stomach knotted. She glanced at him, wondering what brought this on. “Sure.”
“I’ll change my shirt and be right out.”
Joy and dread warred within her. Every time Ted attended church her hopes soared. Is this the day he’ll ask Jesus into his life? Will this be the first of many weeks we’ll sit in church together? Will anyone talk to him? Will he hate the sermon? The music? At best, the experience was bittersweet.
On the drive, Krista rubbed sweaty palms against her cotton skirt, praying fervently in silence. God, please help him feel comfortable, and send men to shake his hand. Let the pastor’s message pierce his heart with truth. Open his eyes to see his need for You. Her endless, noiseless begging continued as she walked toward the double doors.
“Where would you like to sit?” she whispered. No use dragging him up to the front, where she normally settled into one of the first five rows. He would definitely be intimidated then.
Ted pointed to the last row. Krista nodded and slipped into the second chair, leaving him the seat on the end. Her hands, balled tightly into fists, rested in her lap. Her tension mounted as the praise team took the stage.
“I was a wreck, scrutinizing everything,” Krista commented afterward. “Every word the pastor uttered—I wondered how Ted interpreted it. I left with a headache, a stomach ache, and wondered if my life would be easier if he just stayed home. His coming along put me on an emotional roller coaster that left me exhausted and depressed.
“I wished the pastor had said this instead of that, wished the man sitting in front of us was friendlier, and wished the associate minister who prayed for the offering had foregone his mini-sermon about tithing. I already knew how Ted felt about church and money issues.
“Anyway,” Krista continued, catching her breath, “one day the truth hit me. I wasn’t trusting God! Startled by the revelation, I cried. I needed to relax and not worry about all the details. God is sovereign, and He’s big enough to handle the particulars. This concept brought freedom. I still pray for God to take charge of everything said and done, but then I just enjoy the service. God can and will do the rest.”
I resided at the opposite end of the spectrum from Krista. In the early years I invited Dean to church often. If he went, I usually ended up regretting I had asked, be- cause he was miserable. When he said no, disappointment and sorrow nearly did me in. Either way, I lost, so I quit mentioning it.
I adopted a new policy: I would invite him only for special events and programs the kids were involved in unless the Holy Spirit directed otherwise. I would ask with- out pressure or expectation and pray for sensitivity to accept Dean’s answer graciously and trust the Lord for His timing. My spouse’s church attendance and salvation are God’s work, not mine.
Adam is our youngest son, and it was during his senior
My spouse’s church attendance and salvation are God’s work, not mine.
Adam is our youngest son, and it was during his senior year of high school that I felt God tugging at my heart. He wanted me to change churches! Now I’m a woman who likes stability. Dean and I have lived in the same house since before Adam’s birth. We drive a car we’ve owned since Adam was five. You’re getting the picture—change doesn’t come easy or often. And now God wanted my co- operation in willingly seeking a new Body of Believers to fellowship with.
This season held grief, tears, and confusion. I left be- hind the only church home I had known as an adult, the place my kids grew up, the place all three of them started their journeys with Christ. I had been employed there, and the staff and I were on a first-name basis. But hardest of all, I had to resign a teaching ministry in the women’s program that I loved, ministry that bore fruit.
I didn’t understand why God would strip me of everything comfortable and familiar during the difficult time of sending our youngest out of state for college. As I visited other churches, seeking where God wanted me, I sensed God’s will was a small church crammed full of large families. Kids filled every nook and cranny. Why here, God? My aloneness intensified.
I obeyed and joined that little Body of Believers, kicking and screaming all the way. Hindsight is wonderful. Looking back, I understand at least two reasons why God moved me, but I can honestly say it didn’t make sense at the time. His will makes perfect sense now.
The first reason was for Dean. My new pastor, Sam, was a cowboy who wore a pair of boots every Sunday. Those boots helped my husband feel comfortable. Sam prayed for Dean and reached out to him on numerous occasions. At my old church only two men in nearly 17 years ever extended a hand of friendship and welcome.
The second reason was for me. God knew I would need the accountability a small church affords. As I mentioned earlier, going completely alone turned into a huge struggle for me. I needed people who noticed when I didn’t show up, people who would call on Monday morning and say, “Hey, where were you? I missed you.” So God’s crazy idea wasn’t so crazy after all; He knows me better than I know myself.
As women alone on a spiritual journey, we need to prayerfully figure out what works for each of us. Find your place in a church where you’re comfortable, trust your hubby’s church participation to God, and don’t sweat the details. Last, trust God even if the way He’s leading makes little sense at the time. He truly knows best.
TWO SCRIPTURAL EXAMPLES
Now we’ll look at Scripture to examine the ways two Bible characters dealt with loneliness. The first fellow, John, referred to himself as “the disciple whom Jesus loved” (John 13:23; 21:7, 20). The son of Zebedee, the brother of James, and a fisherman by trade, this man, along with Peter and his brother James, became Christ’s closest friend and confidant. He was the one whom Jesus entrusted with His mother’s care upon His death.
So John knew the richness of sweet fellowship both during Christ’s life as one of the 12 disciples and after Christ’s death as one of the apostles who continued tire- lessly to spread the gospel. In Acts we see him joining Peter on a mission trip to Samaria and praying with other believers. In Galatians he’s referred to as a pillar.
Find your place in a church where you’re comfortable, trust your hubby’s church participation to God, and don’t sweat the details.
Yet at the end of John’s life we find him in exile and very much alone. “I, John, your brother and companion in the suffering and kingdom and patient endurance that are ours in Jesus, was on the island of Patmos because of the word of God and the testimony of Jesus” (Rev. 1:9). Apparently sent there for sharing his faith, John wrote the Book of Revelation from that isolated island.
I’m so impressed because, unlike me, John made the best of a bad situation. He wasn’t questioning, complaining, or throwing a pity party for himself. He used his loneliness wisely, at the feet of God, receiving divine revelation, recording what he saw, and sending the scrolls to the seven churches in Ephesus, Smyrna, Pergamum, Thy- atira, Sardis, Philadelphia, and Laodicea.
Solomon, on the other hand, tried to fill the lonely, empty places in his life with everything but God. He was David and Bathsheba’s second child. Though David’s life of spiritual faithfulness for the most part gave Solomon a solid example, the boy also grew up in a home where polygamy was practiced and jealousy and strife were evident.
Solomon started his reign well, but his first foolish mistake was choosing a pagan king’s daughter for his wife. This choice began his moral decline. Then God appeared to him in a vision and encouraged him to ask for whatever he wished. Admitting his weakness and ignorance, he requested a discerning heart. Pleased with Solomon’s wise selection, God not only granted his petition but also promised him that he would be the wisest of men and obtain great riches and honor as well.
As his wealth and fame increased, Solomon loved the splendor. He developed a taste for luxury and led an extravagant lifestyle. Marrying foreign women, he became excessively sensual. His many wives influenced him to sanctify idolatry, and eventually he even oppressed the people of Israel.
Though he was known as the wisest man, his decision to fill his emptiness with more—more women, more sex, more material possessions—proved to be a bad choice. According to one Bible scholar, “Solomon’s description of a fool in Proverbs is a vivid picture of his own failings.”*?I believe each of us has a void in our lives that only God can fill. Instead of letting God fill his void, Solomon found himself empty, and the more he acquired, the emptier he became.
Most believe Solomon is the author of Ecclesiastes. Let’s look at the words he penned there: “‘Meaningless! Meaningless!’ says the Teacher. ‘Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless’” (1:2). “Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income” (5:10). This man had every- thing yet found satisfaction in nothing.
He ends his philosophical musing with this key verse: “Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man” (12:13). I wonder how differently his life might have turned out had he taken his own good advice.
Whether your life is filled to overflowing with people or you are in a season of isolation, choose to fill your voids with God alone. I’ve made both choices, having searched for answers in the things of this world and let- ting God be my all in all. Only in Him did I find peace, contentment, and joy—even in my empty pew.
PONDERING GOD’S WORD
“Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Heb. 10:24-25). ?
“‘I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’” (Jer. 29:11). ?
“God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I for- sake you’” (Heb. 13:5). ?
“A time is coming, and has come, when you will be scattered, each to his own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me” (John 16:32). ?
“O LORD, do not forsake me; be not far from me, O my God” (Ps. 38:21). ?
Dearest Father,? Please be with me in those lonely times that naturally arise out ?of an unequally yoked relationship. Make me aware of my limitations, and give me the wisdom to choose wisely the activities that will enhance my growth and not cause me to stumble. And God, please reveal where You want me to serve in Your Body of Believers. ?On the occasions my husband does attend church, I invite You to be in charge instead of me. Teach me to rest, knowing You are there with me. Open my spouse’s ears to hear what You know he’s ready to hear. Lay upon the hearts of men to reach out to him, and, Father, flood me with Your peace, that I may rest in You. ?I long to follow where You lead, so don’t let fear or lack of understanding paralyze me. May my trust be in You alone, knowing that You’re completely trustworthy. The plans You have for me are for my best, even when it doesn’t seem that way at the time. I thank You, my dearest and most faithful companion, for Your promise to never leave me. I love You, Lord. In Your name I pray. Amen.
From Spiritually Single.
?
Mark 9 allows us an eyewitness account of a mountain top experience Jesus has with some of his early followers. It’s known as the ‘transfiguration’ – which is a fancy name to communicate that Jesus reveals more of who He really is to them. There are some lessons here for us. Life is only lived in one direction – forward. God moments are just that, moments. Enjoy them, but keep following Jesus forward in life. Pray for them (see Ephesians 1:17).
Preached at Elements City Church. Used by permission.
God interacts with us through His Word. He does not catalog practical advice like a technical manual, but instead teaches us of His love and interactions with mankind through a powerful narrative. As we read His Story, we understand Him more and are transformed by who He is and how He loves and redeems us.
