A loop is a repeating cycle of acting and reacting… and reacting from an unbiblical image of marriage. Pursuer-Distancer is a loop where one partner is smothering the relationship, while the other is starving it. The Shamer-Defender loop is where one partner gets frustrated with the other and they call them out on it, but not in a healthy way. Parent-Child is a loop where the partner feels the value in constructively helping their spouse by showing or teaching them how to live life better. A Pre-Schooler loop is a stubborn resistance to compromise. Finally, the Over-Functioner vs. the Under-Functioner loop deals with responsibility and co-dependence. The more the Over-Functioner does, the less the Under-Functioner does, thus applying stress and pressure for the former to do more and do it right. 

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