Weird and Wonderful Bible Ways to Find a Mate
Forget online matchmaking sites. If you need some tips on finding love, perhaps these weird and wonderful Old Testament tales will inspire you. We will also examine four passionate Bible love stories to help you win a heart.
But just for fun…hilarious Bible dating advice:
Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her a new wardrobe. Then she’s yours: Any old Hebrew guy (Deuteronomy 21:11-13).
Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you’ll definitely find someone: Cain (Genesis 4:16-17).
Don’t be picky. Collect as many girls as you can get. Surely one will make you happy: Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3).
Cut 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law’s enemies and get his daughter as your prize: David (I Samuel 18:27).
Go to a party and hide. When the women come outside to dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife: Benjaminites…those party animals! (Judges 21:19-2).
Just kidding. But God gives some advice that could change your love life.
Unconditional acceptance, passion and perseverance, wisdom and discretion, fearlessness and faithfulness are irresistible qualities any man or woman desires.
Hosea and Gomer
No one showed unconditional acceptance like Hosea. God commanded Hosea, his prophet, to wed and bed a prostitute. Beautiful Gomer wandered away from her husband and family, repeatedly deserting them to return to her sordid life as a whore. But Hosea rescued his bride, filthy and frail, from the slave-trader’s auction block. Hosea redeemed his unfaithful wife for an exorbitant amount, swept her up into his forgiving arms and brought her home. The amazing love story of Hosea and Gomer demonstrates God’s unfailing love for an unfaithful, idolatrous people.
If you are a Gomer, it’s never to late to repent and return to God. His compassion will renew and restore you. No matter what your past may be, God will help you experience real love.
If you are a Hosea, don’t give up. The great heart of God can teach you unconditional acceptance. No perfect person exists, but a great heart attracts great love.
Jacob and Rachel
Persistence and perseverance was demonstrated by the most unlikely of Bible characters. Jacob was no candidate for man of the year. Sneaky and selfish, he fled his father’s house because he deceived his elderly father and stole his older brother’s birthright and blessing. However, this con man learned persevering love for a woman, and his devotion shows us how we can win a heart. Jacob stole one glance at stunning Rachel and it was love at first sight.
But God gave Jacob a taste of his own medicine. His uncle Laban cheated him. As Laban’s nephew, Jacob agreed to work seven years with smelly sheep to win Rachel’s hand. The wedding night was a disaster. Laban replaced Rachel with her older sister Leah while Jacob snored in a drunken stupor. The foggy bridegroom awoke to find homely Leah in his bed. (There’s more to this story…)
However, Jacob persevered. He promised to work another seven years for his beloved Rachel. The Bible said Jacob was so smitten the time flew by. Do you know anyone who would tirelessly toil for fourteen years to win the woman of his dreams? Jacob worked and waited. And Rachel was worth the wait!
Nowadays, most of us display the patience of a gnat. We pitch a fit if our internet is too slow. Speed dating is the order of the day, and nobody waits for marriage to hook up with a potential partner. Shame on us! Love is hard work. If you want to truly, deeply love someone, you have to be persistent and patient.
David and Abigail
Wisdom and discretion can be winning qualities to attract a good husband or wife. Abigail was married to a jerk and a drunkard. Her fat, rich, lazy husband Nabal refused to show hospitality to David’s mighty men. Dumb decision! But Abigail was one savvy woman. When she discovered the devastating news and impending destruction of her family, she hurriedly prepared a sumptuous feast, bowed low and apologized to David for Nabal’s rudeness. When foolish Nabal sobered up and found out what might have happened to him, he keeled over with a massive coronary. David remembered the widow’s gracious wisdom, and took her as his wife.
Do you feel trapped, surrounded by losers? Hold your ground. Immerse yourself in God’s Word. Find a church. Serve God well. Be a catch and God will reward your spiritual maturity and discreet behavior.
Boaz and Ruth
The romance of Ruth and Boaz is remarkable glimpse into a love built on fearlessness and faithfulness. Ruth came to Israel a poor widow in a foreign land. She devoted her life to the care of her mother-in-law, Naomi. Naomi was a sad, bitter old woman. (Naomi cried, “call me Marah” which means “bitter.” The lovely Moabitess, undaunted by setbacks and heartache, faithfully gleaned in a rich relative’s field to survive.
Boaz noticed the young woman’s loyalty and integrity. He admired her and showed her favor by generously providing for this sweet young woman. Following her mother-in-law’s advice, Ruth made a daring robe-proposal. She slept at the feet of her benefactor, a near-kinsman of Naomi. In doing so, Ruth asked Boaz to marry her. This was no sexually-charged proposition. In fact, she demonstrated the true qualities of holiness and loyalty to her family. Boaz was delighted. Ruth walked a hard road of grief, pain and isolation. Her Heavenly Father rewarded her with a devoted husband, a son, and the honor of being the great-great-grandmother of Jesus.
Be a godly man or woman. But be gutsy too. Follow where He leads and you may find your Boaz or Ruth just around the corner!